Aye

Exis · 07-24-2014, 07:03 AM

Have you ever slept with a broken heart?
still distressed
when awoke your scarred
by the clenchin' of potent shards
screams are the only thing that you hear before lonely starts
believein' is focusin',
you haven't seen what can slowly harm
like the misleadin' of roads your on
that always steer you off over arcs
best take a path in direction that only leads to where holy are
currently stationed,
where it's let's hurry for places
if we beat who just holds us up
we can rub we won in they faces
yo there be hundreds of layers to this onion wrapped world
and always uncoverin' sumthin' is just discoverin' greatness
you can either love it or hate it,
like your frontin' ass girl
you could be someone that'll fake it
or take shit as it's comin' and don't even run it past her.

Half Wit It · 07-24-2014, 08:11 AM

Always dug your rhyme scheme. The last Half of your verse made me nostalgic AF. Not sure if this was just a warm up piece but I recommend migrating back to your grimey, cut throat style of aggressive wording. On mobile so I won't quote but you had at least six bars that stuck out. Collabo?

Eŋg · 08-05-2014, 04:28 PM

i like reading what you write because you genuinely seem to have fun with it. you can rhyme pretty well, too, which helps. this isn't what i'm used to seeing from you, it's usually aggressive rhyming in a mock-battle rap format where you're not really trying to say anything. i was aware you had different wrinkles to your game, i suppose what i'm saying is i hadn't read something like this, from you, before. it was good. still carries the hallmark of your writing but in a different mood. i'm way too stagnant to even realistically say this to people but: write more.

07-24-2014, 07:03 AM	#1
Exis ............ Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 3,934 Battle Record: 3-3 Rep Power: 0	Aye Have you ever slept with a broken heart? still distressed when awoke your scarred by the clenchin' of potent shards screams are the only thing that you hear before lonely starts believein' is focusin', you haven't seen what can slowly harm like the misleadin' of roads your on that always steer you off over arcs best take a path in direction that only leads to where holy are currently stationed, where it's let's hurry for places if we beat who just holds us up we can rub we won in they faces yo there be hundreds of layers to this onion wrapped world and always uncoverin' sumthin' is just discoverin' greatness you can either love it or hate it, like your frontin' ass girl you could be someone that'll fake it or take shit as it's comin' and don't even run it past her.

07-24-2014, 08:11 AM	#2
Half Wit It Nalyubuites Join Date: Jun 2014 Posts: 449 Battle Record: 1-2 Rep Power: 4465335	Always dug your rhyme scheme. The last Half of your verse made me nostalgic AF. Not sure if this was just a warm up piece but I recommend migrating back to your grimey, cut throat style of aggressive wording. On mobile so I won't quote but you had at least six bars that stuck out. Collabo? __________________

08-05-2014, 04:28 PM	#3
Eŋg rhyme capsule. Join Date: Sep 2018 Posts: 2,150 Rep Power: 0	i like reading what you write because you genuinely seem to have fun with it. you can rhyme pretty well, too, which helps. this isn't what i'm used to seeing from you, it's usually aggressive rhyming in a mock-battle rap format where you're not really trying to say anything. i was aware you had different wrinkles to your game, i suppose what i'm saying is i hadn't read something like this, from you, before. it was good. still carries the hallmark of your writing but in a different mood. i'm way too stagnant to even realistically say this to people but: write more.