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#1 |
Sophomore Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 176
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I’m naked. I woke up, hoping it was all a nightmare.
Daydreaming. my minds pale. Blood loss from the throat up. You’re gone now. Routine whenever there’s attachment. and whenever theres attachment. there’s angst for the spillage my cigarette burn, bought me a beer. chug it down + use the glass for amaryllis hungry black wolves, guard my castle. you could come get me, but theres hungry black wolves guarding my castle it’s sort of ironic, how lowly that i’ve been. am i just a spark that’s supposed to be light? but i’m not bright enough, to warm lonely at night. codependent maelstrom the whirl of a thousand open sentence slow repentance. masturbation outcomes i’m tired of doing, exhausted of clearance. agitated. sugar coat the candy painting that i’ve blatantly brushed with orange frosting i’m so close to offing off myself, that i’ve maybe made absolutely nothing of it single seed, been diseased. semblance. cross-hair, fist is squeezed. the annotation has been made. covert warfare with figurine trenches never been the type to celebrate. 1 year anniversary. ehh, it can wait tears turn to puddles. makeshift. a couple, only read as crumbs from the bread we baked. smuggling the puzzle pieces till i’m desperately placing our crumbled memories go into kiss you. muscle memory. you turn away my hug exchanges. lol @ the subtle changes. told you you changed, told me i "didn’t know the real you" what a surprise! here comes the: “guess you never knew me, what’s the deal dude?” here comes the buzzkill. here comes the mildew. forward my emails. Are you sorta contrived? Morbidly sigh as i warble in hopes of your demise coast is clear. decadent marvelling, glass of whiskey, here’s hoping that all of it dies sum has been cleared. division mustve been something else Told to love myself. couldn’t hear them with a gun in each ear. Justifying resentment. i was blind enough with two mice Who’s gonna dance with me now. Waltz in the moonlight hand to hand combat, face to face slowdance. gesundheit foot in foot weaving. Tango with tutelage. looks deceive. So tongue in cheek with death, I loosened his hood seaming poignant. damsel in distress. in that dress your curves are coitus one hand on your hip. one hand on the wineglass served with poison Last edited by BWHAHA; 11-12-2013 at 04:00 AM. |
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#2 |
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 8,898
Battle Record: 27-22
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I like how you hide your rhymes no homo
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http://split8.yolasite.com |
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#3 |
living
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,485
Battle Record: 33-18
Accomplishments - Hall of Fame
Champed - AOWL Season 1
- Art of Writing League
- AOWL Season 4
- Write Week V
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PLANK!
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Zack Wicks for president |
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#4 |
nok Su kow
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 4,505
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I can't leave a comment about this, because some people may become jealous.
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"black as midnight..black as pitch blacker than the soul of the foulest witch" |
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#5 |
Sophomore Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
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We wouldn't want that.
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#6 |
Do what is right.
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 769
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Did u rhyme orange? Dope
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#7 |
White Earl
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I thought this was fucking awesome
Get jealous, people. This verse had it moments of insane brilliance, and a few moments f "I wish he would have done something different rite there" But it was a great read.
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-A.bove T.he R.est |
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#8 |
( ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º)
Join Date: Jan 2013
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Agreed, thought it was dope. Thought some of the sentences seemed rather choppy, but not a huge problem to the overall impression of your verse. Enjoyed the at times sporadic flow as if it was mirroring you in distress, it's unintentional but that's how I perceived it while reading it. Thought it was a cool drop, keep it up.
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I'm not a slave for entertainment, I'm entertainments personal slave,
So deep into writing I'm concerned bout the text on my grave. www.youtube.com/watch?v=gV8ozGcGJ6o |
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#9 |
Sophomore Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 176
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Thanks for the time gentlepeople. I will return feed, on all pieces on the front page.
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