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Old 09-26-2013, 06:00 PM   #1
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Default RD1: Bags vs. Shogun Dinero aka Gamble - {Bags wins by TKO}


The Long Anticipated...
NC

II
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Round 1

Rules:

10 lines minimum/16 maximum (If u & ur oppenent agree to more that's fine)
No swaying
No biting
No recycling
No other dumb shit that will get u DQd

Voting on 6 battles is mandatory, or u will be docked 2 for every one u miss. Links MUST be posted in the voting links thread at the top of the forum.

Any other questions or concerns PM myself or Sn00p.
@Ole Dirty Bagstard @Shogun Dinero

Last edited by Strikta; 09-27-2013 at 07:59 PM.
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Old 09-27-2013, 01:56 AM   #2
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Verses due Thursday, October 3rd @ 11:59 pm CST
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Old 09-27-2013, 08:53 PM   #3
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Gamble u are so fucked.
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Originally Posted by DMS View Post
My dad once had like 4 beers at a family reunion, and drove us home better than my mom usually drives.
Not saying being drunk doesn’t mess up you reasoning. I’m turning 20 soon so I haven’t had a drink ever.
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Old 09-27-2013, 09:45 PM   #4
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Lol, check gl bags
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Old 10-03-2013, 10:12 PM   #5
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Droppin tomorrow
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My dad once had like 4 beers at a family reunion, and drove us home better than my mom usually drives.
Not saying being drunk doesn’t mess up you reasoning. I’m turning 20 soon so I haven’t had a drink ever.
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Old 10-03-2013, 11:03 PM   #6
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Got 16. U droppin tonight?
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Old 10-04-2013, 07:51 PM   #7
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Vs Ol Dirty Bagstard aka Anthony Colavito

Ur buggin of u think Colavito can pound me.

.... Acting like the big bully.. He gained a reputation giving speeches off false reasons to doubt me.
But thats when u got ur ass ethered for tryna push Meth around, see.. U ended up like Walter White in the season finale...
.... It would b in ur best interest if U don't continue this thing we call beef, kid - be more vegan.
Keep acting tough & next you'll end up fucking dropped cuz of ur attitude - this fraud treated like Josh Freeman...
.... Always runnin ya damn mouth, I dare u to swing if u dare to stand in the ring.
Bagsy knows that hes just a faggot known for being High & Bi - just ask Karaoke what song Anthony sings.
.... This lame bitch is corny an frail, watch how his history repeats itself when Bourne on your trail.
Launch a Aero through ur heart - it's pure Domination that u facing when the outcome is identical to that Tag Tourny u failed...
.... Still wonder how hes considered a vet. You'll live to regret after this. As for ur life? I wish u the best.
It aint me fantasizing. When I set this MAN ON FIRE, its only right I Mark Anthony for imminent death...
.... & this what u get. Bags is a fucking bitch an only worthy for, preparing my turkey sauce.
We could play quick & the dead - talking out his ass - listen how full of shit he is, when Dirty draws...
.... No mercy for his worthless verse it's soft an honestly yo ur big caps just lacks in confidence bro.
Always making an ass out of yaself. So stealing his life is less of a job than Robin Thick hoes - this more like Miley exposed...
.... So I fucking bitch slap this riding dick trash. With a plan to kidnap this lame gimmick.
Tie ur bitch ass to the chair & make u sit with me so I don't have to eat alone this year for Thanksgiving...

And I ain't kidding.
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Old 10-04-2013, 11:04 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shogun Dinero View Post
Lol yeah kiss fm in Poughkeepsie Ny.
Honestly I was lucky, and it wasn't even my doing. The song I made for my friends who passed on a car accident (Tim and Danielle) were very popular in my highschool. And the song I made ended up surfacing thru the community like wild fire and the next thing I know I have all these comments on my soundclick page about the song. I guess it touched alot of the ppl I went to school with and one day I got a call from one of my boys telling me to turn the radio on. The radio guy said that he got so many calls to play a song he never even heard of that they literally tracked it down and played it on the air lol. They only played it once but still a defining moment. Lol
Fuck those dead faggots.


Its mad strange u saw that wreck as a ticket to the fastlane
U spit at their crosses on the road to success JUST to get ya track played
This is the end yo. U think i give a fuck about ur friends bro?
Im damon waynes w/razor blades.... carving FAGGOT on their headstone
U gettin amped as shit & thats swell...but stop kiddin yaself
pump ya brakes or that drive'll be the end of u.....just ask tim & danielle
Ur drug past is dark. gettin clean is easy for a man w/heart
But fam goddamn its hard when u bang more junk then a salvage yard
swag an flow? Wack. But i kno why this kid so hype an shit
Them childish lines go straight to ur head....you snortin flinstone vitamins
Im swimmin in bitches my breast stroke hurtin these hoes
His first breast stroke was followed by carving the rest of the turkey alone
Shit is sad. This kids a fag. U introduce ya trick to bags..?
Ill hit the skag an she'll skip the rag. Have ya bitch late like a strikta mag
Tryed to get the battle on sum swag shit....dude wats next?
U wanna pick a different trade? OK. Trade places with ur two dead friends
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My dad once had like 4 beers at a family reunion, and drove us home better than my mom usually drives.
Not saying being drunk doesn’t mess up you reasoning. I’m turning 20 soon so I haven’t had a drink ever.
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Old 10-05-2013, 04:20 PM   #9
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I didn't really feel Shogun Dinero's verse tbh, it wasn't awful but there wasn't anything really stand out about it to me. He had a few lines that were okay, but I didn't think he had anything in there that was hard hitting.

Rocket Ninja Pirate Slayer had the better battle verse pretty much all round. The dead friends angle might be a bit harsh, I suppose.. but it obviously made for a hard hitting verse. I also preferred the flow and wording of his verse too.

But yeah, I'm not sure if this will count as I'm not in the tournament but if it does...

Vote - Bags.
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Old 10-05-2013, 06:03 PM   #10
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Rape. Bags whole verse was pretty harsh. Shogun had sum good ideas but they were stretched n the wording was pretty off. Bags got this easy
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Old 10-05-2013, 06:12 PM   #11
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@Sintro

Explain a lil further in detail on that vote plz, or it won't count as legit.
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Old 10-05-2013, 06:24 PM   #12
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Bags opener n flinstone vitamins

Vs

Domination tourney u failed.

Bags worst line was the carving turkey line n it was still worded better than shos whole verse.
@Strikta good enough now?
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Old 10-05-2013, 06:37 PM   #13
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Combined w/ the line & 1/2 of a vote in ur first post.. lol.. yeah, this will do.
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Old 10-06-2013, 12:43 AM   #14
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Gam first two line were aight .. aero dom line was good man of fire line was ill rest was avg closer you kind of made fun of yourself ... I think this was too personal for you to think straight battle wise homie real talk sometimes you have to step back and realize the voters need to like it too

Bagsy first 2 lines were real good .. ouch dude went in the turkey line was blah but everything else was pretty harsh closer being the end game ... see you took it all personal but kept it completely reader frinedly good shit


Gotta v bags here he brought it
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Old 10-06-2013, 09:06 PM   #15
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.... Still wonder how hes considered a vet. You'll live to regret after this. As for ur life? I wish u the best.
It aint me fantasizing. When I set this MAN ON FIRE, its only right I Mark Anthony for imminent death...
.... & this what u get. Bags is a fucking bitch an only worthy for, preparing my turkey sauce.
We could play quick & the dead - talking out his ass - listen how full of shit he is, when Dirty draws...

vs

This is the end yo. U think i give a fuck about ur friends bro?
Im damon waynes w/razor blades.... carving FAGGOT on their headstone
U gettin amped as shit & thats swell...but stop kiddin yaself
pump ya brakes or that drive'll be the end of u.....just ask tim & danielle
Im swimmin in bitches my breast stroke hurtin these hoes
His first breast stroke was followed by carving the rest of the turkey alone
Tryed to get the battle on sum swag shit....dude wats next?
U wanna pick a different trade? OK. Trade places with ur two dead friends


Cool battle. Meth was okay. Bit basic considering how long the line is and how much you had to work with. Wording could be smoother, too. You could cut out so many words to make the line more concise and hit harder. Josh Freeman is obscure to me. Sorry, man. High & Bi is pretty played by now. Karaoke been around a hot minute. Aerodom line could of been better. Would of used Dominate instead of domination. Also, your most stretched line yet. Mark Anthony was a pretty dope concept. Could of been better, but still probably your best line yet. Dirty draws pretty good concept, too. You just need to make your lines more concise and make your wording smoother. Too many pauses, this ain't longbar. Seen tons of better Miley lines lately (twerk). This one needed more than a 'making an ass out of yaself' connection. Thanksgiving was a good idea for a personal, but you didn't make it harsh enough. See my battle with Arch if he shows for how to flip a self-personal harshly against your opponent. Tieing to a chair and making him eat Thanksgiving with you isn't really hard-hitting. Bags opener was a decent jab. Nothing too harsh yet. Carving faggot was harsh as fuck, though. Hit very hard. Those are the types of lines I'm trying to get into now. Good man. Tim & Danielle wasn't freshest concept ever and not as harsh as previous line, but better than first IMO. Salvage yard wasn't really feeling too much. Could of been harsher. Flintsone vitamins was alright, too. Another jab. Breast stroke was roflz. Set-up was pretty good, too. That's more like it. Late is real played, but I did like the Strikta mag punchline. Relevant. Swag & Flow was cool. Closer was possibly second harshest line of the battle. Strong finish. Overall, battle wasn't really close. Jason's lines are just too stretched here and his wording is too longbar. Needs to make his lines shorter and more concise. Harsher, etc. He had some good concepts and showed some nice creativity, though. Silver lining. Either way, Bags got this with a lot harsher and hard-hitting verse. Props to both.

/v bags
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Old 10-06-2013, 11:42 PM   #16
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Gamble... your shit was too wordy to me... that being said, aero shit was ok... man on fire was cool... most of the rest were cool ideas that weren't worded harsh enough. Bags went in on the personal route and I liked it... no punches pulled... the harshness enough to outweigh the use of the same angle.

Vote Bags
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Old 10-06-2013, 11:42 PM   #17
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Gamble... your shit was too wordy to me... that being said, aero shit was ok... man on fire was cool... most of the rest were cool ideas that weren't worded harsh enough. Bags went in on the personal route and I liked it... no punches pulled... the harshness enough to outweigh the use of the same angle.

Vote Bags
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Old 10-07-2013, 10:10 AM   #18
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.... Acting like the big bully.. He gained a reputation giving speeches off false reasons to doubt me.
But thats when u got ur ass ethered for tryna push Meth around, see.. U ended up like Walter White in the season finale...
^way too wordy. concept itself wasn't bad, but fuck u for spoilers. anyways, this coulda been real good if u'd been more concise w/ the wording. as is, it was still aight.
.... It would b in ur best interest if U don't continue this thing we call beef, kid - be more vegan.
Keep acting tough & next you'll end up fucking dropped cuz of ur attitude - this fraud treated like Josh Freeman...
^again. too wordy. cut all the unnecessary slack. u have so many unneeded words in there. concept wasn't bad again. but pls just say 'keep acting tough & u'll get dropped for ur attitude worse than josh freeman' or something. i know that wasn't a perfect flip, but urs is just way too hard too read. decent line overall
.... Always runnin ya damn mouth, I dare u to swing if u dare to stand in the ring.
Bagsy knows that hes just a faggot known for being High & Bi - just ask Karaoke what song Anthony sings.
^okay, this is a def a trend and u def need to work on ur wording. concept was kinda outta the blue. shoulda mentioned the high and bi things in ur setup.
.... This lame bitch is corny an frail, watch how his history repeats itself when Bourne on your trail.
Launch a Aero through ur heart - it's pure Domination that u facing when the outcome is identical to that Tag Tourny u failed...
^yea aite. concept's fine. wording is...okay, i guess. decent line
.... Still wonder how hes considered a vet. You'll live to regret after this. As for ur life? I wish u the best.
It aint me fantasizing. When I set this MAN ON FIRE, its only right I Mark Anthony for imminent death...
^i just did a mark anthony for death line on him. so this doesn't hit at all for me
.... & this what u get. Bags is a fucking bitch an only worthy for, preparing my turkey sauce.
We could play quick & the dead - talking out his ass - listen how full of shit he is, when Dirty draws...
^oookay. concept not bad. wording kinda worked here too. aite
.... No mercy for his worthless verse it's soft an honestly yo ur big caps just lacks in confidence bro.
Always making an ass out of yaself. So stealing his life is less of a job than Robin Thick hoes - this more like Miley exposed...
^woah, this was all over the place. i get the wordplay and the concept's there, and it's creative, but this was just too messy.
.... So I fucking bitch slap this riding dick trash. With a plan to kidnap this lame gimmick.
Tie ur bitch ass to the chair & make u sit with me so I don't have to eat alone this year for Thanksgiving...
^nahhh. this hurt urself more than him

vs.

Its mad strange u saw that wreck as a ticket to the fastlane
U spit at their crosses on the road to success JUST to get ya track played
^hmm. story didn't read like that at all.
This is the end yo. U think i give a fuck about ur friends bro?
Im damon waynes w/razor blades.... carving FAGGOT on their headstone
^lol okay
U gettin amped as shit & thats swell...but stop kiddin yaself
pump ya brakes or that drive'll be the end of u.....just ask tim & danielle
^okay
Ur drug past is dark. gettin clean is easy for a man w/heart
But fam goddamn its hard when u bang more junk then a salvage yard
^aite. personal hit
swag an flow? Wack. But i kno why this kid so hype an shit
Them childish lines go straight to ur head....you snortin flinstone vitamins
^aite
Im swimmin in bitches my breast stroke hurtin these hoes
His first breast stroke was followed by carving the rest of the turkey alone
^haha
Shit is sad. This kids a fag. U introduce ya trick to bags..?
Ill hit the skag an she'll skip the rag. Have ya bitch late like a strikta mag
^dece
Tryed to get the battle on sum swag shit....dude wats next?
U wanna pick a different trade? OK. Trade places with ur two dead friends
^harsh. hit becuz of that

so yea. gamble coulda won this tbh. he had some nice concepts, but his wording killed them. it's a shame tbh, cuz this woulda been a real close and good battle, if he had had better wording. i could even see myself giving it to him. buuut gamble didn't have good wording and that cost him. bags had more hits becuz of that, and they hit harder. so yea, i got bags here. but plz gamble fix up ur wording, cuz ur concepts ain't bad at all. still,
v/bags
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Old 10-07-2013, 10:21 AM   #19
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.... Acting like the big bully.. He gained a reputation giving speeches off false reasons to doubt me.
But thats when u got ur ass ethered for tryna push Meth around, see.. U ended up like Walter White in the season finale...
.... Still wonder how hes considered a vet. You'll live to regret after this. As for ur life? I wish u the best.
It aint me fantasizing. When I set this MAN ON FIRE, its only right I Mark Anthony for imminent death...

vs.

Its mad strange u saw that wreck as a ticket to the fastlane
U spit at their crosses on the road to success JUST to get ya track played
This is the end yo. U think i give a fuck about ur friends bro?
Im damon waynes w/razor blades.... carving FAGGOT on their headstone
U gettin amped as shit & thats swell...but stop kiddin yaself
pump ya brakes or that drive'll be the end of u.....just ask tim & danielle
Ur drug past is dark. gettin clean is easy for a man w/heart
But fam goddamn its hard when u bang more junk then a salvage yard
swag an flow? Wack. But i kno why this kid so hype an shit
Them childish lines go straight to ur head....you snortin flinstone vitamins
Im swimmin in bitches my breast stroke hurtin these hoes
His first breast stroke was followed by carving the rest of the turkey alone

Tryed to get the battle on sum swag shit....dude wats next?
U wanna pick a different trade? OK. Trade places with ur two dead friends



Jesus at that carving line. This wasn't even close. Bags slayed em with personals. That was hard to read tbh.

V/ Bags
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Old 10-07-2013, 12:39 PM   #20
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Thanks @ Frank Metts, Arch, sn00p, Beyond
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