To write or Not to write

[Word]

To write or not to write that is the question
in the mind of the lyricist, the introspection
to inflect the rejection or reject the inflection
to spread repressed regrets like an infection
an elect imperfection inspected for defection
accept it or reject it as a message of reflection
Affectionately intentionally carefully deciding
each rhyme inside dividing where he's fighing
in his mind as he's writing each line he's trying
to find the right way to remind them, he's dying
he's crying inside, it's like each line is slicing
his mind like a knife, as each rhyme's enticing
inviting him keep writing the verbs and synonyms
expressions and inventions, words in him begin
to advance and dance as he works at it again
and again pretending it's not a hard decision
but the words are far from givin, but within him
deep within him, he must cast as if he's fishin
for deep questions by examining deep visions
keeps rendering phrases making connections
expectations not met needing further inspection
is that word perfect three, is it the right expression
in quiet exasperation, he must try to make a decision
to write or not to write...
This is the answer to that question.

[Certain]

Your rhymes are very simple. That's not to say they don't work. But you would do well to rhyme less off -ion and -ing sounds. Mix those in instead of forming the backbone of the verse with them. In this verse, those rhymes were the first thing I noticed.

Your content was cliche, as well. Ground your thoughts in stronger images. The embattled writer is a popular topic, so you really have to do something to make it feel unique.

[Word]

Hey, yo! Thanks for the feedback... kinda what I was thinking about this piece. Appreciate the feed :)

[Objective]

Got to agree with the shit Certain Serpent explains in his feed. It seemed rather simple, you got something going but it doesn't really come out as original or dope, it's a piece and that's it. And as he said as well; ''-ction''-rhymes is simple and too easy so I'd advice against building up rhyme schemes based on those rhymes.

I'm a sucker for punctuation so I'd like to see more of that as well. Either way, the flow is great in this so the verse isn't completely useless, but it didn't captivate me in any way either.

You got some ideas going that'll be dope once you start exapanding on them and really explore different ways of expressing your thoughts. Looking forward to read more from you and if I was you I'd sign up for the Writing Challenge League. A lot of different/challenging tasks will be given but you'll also face some pretty great writers. If you really want to improve and become great stepping into these battles is the way to go as there will always be people to pick apart your work and compare it to your opponent. You might get some losses on your stats, but you'll improve a lot quicker as well.

he's crying inside, it's like each line is slicing
his mind like a knife, as each rhyme's enticing
^ I liked this couplet, but try to stay away from using the word ''like''. Infact, your couplet would have been stronger if you removed it from the first line. That each line is actually slicing his mind like a knife is stronger than it's like it's doing it, if you get what I'm saying.

Keep writing and posting shit. Welcome to Netcees. ^^

[YDK]

Damn man I think this is the first piece I ever read from you that literally lost me flow wise cuz my mouth couldn't keep up with the speed I read it at lmao the multies innera an outters all read smoothly an transitioned o subtly I almost missed the different rhyme changes. I can see you have lost your touch with the mind fuck verses lol def a well written piece man I wanna see more stuff from ya you know I always enjoyed your writing. Keep dropping homie

[Word]

thanks for the feed, yo! Appreciated... next drop I will try to do something more "elaborate"... as a matter of fact, I think I'm just going to write something now and see what I can come up with after being inspired by a few of the writers here... and p.s. I am signed up for WCL, just need to find time to vote on a few battles and get a feel for the competition :-D

[BWHAHA]

certain serpent is spot on. I like that you're dropping, word.

[Albert Rhymestein]

Simple but I see potential I liked the slicing inside line I thought it was a really cool imagery

[Dope girl]

Not bad, I think you need complexity & Creativity.

[SiK]

Decent piece here.

Honestly could have spread out the 'rhyming words' and added more content/depth to it..

Overall not bad...just simple as stated above...keep dropping though for sure