Summer Classic Rnd. 1 Magazine

[Paradigm]

The Summer Classic VII


Hello Netcees! Welcome to the Summer Classic VII! I'm your host, Paradigm. The Summer Classic is Netcees Premier Tournament, almost every past winner is an auto vote into the Hall of Fame, it's where legends are born and dreams are crushed for those who aspire to be the best. Will this years tournament live up to the hype or crash and burn? forever to be regarded as The Summer Tragic. This years tournament is headlined by former winner Alvin Karpis, and Semi-Finalists Beyond, Constrikta, hotdogvendorman, Orc and ill nik-A. Will vets like Allen Knight, Tettris and King Karaoke ascend and take the crown from these past great battlers or will another netcee rise and take the crown? Stay tuned and be ready to witness the greatness that comes along with The Summer Classic.

Summer Classic V Highlights

Summer Classic V Final: Joe Metts vs Alvin Karpis (Alvin Karpis Wins 6-4)

Joe Metts:
It's a fact that u wack so back to back? Nah. This dudes lines don't land or hit
mines'll DDT him on a thesaurus until he realizes he won't be the 2 time champ of shit
we should put something on the line. yaknow? just to give it a stamp
i think putting ur jersey collection up would be symbolic, since they'd fit me like a champ
n is this pussy kidding wit me. a ref stoppage is the prediction from me
n after he gives the Bella ring, Al'll turn into a Total Diva n channel his inner Nikki n Brie
n bey slaughtered you. nah he daughtered you n you can't even say shit
the finals being Bayless has boggled my mind daily more then he does Stephen A. Smith
plus you lost Rd. 3. this 3 times in 1 tourney someones eatin him up
i ain't talking OM writers when i say i should CopyPat since he already ethered this punk
i was slicing him up pre-battle. son was down n out before this
....he had two cuts before the showdown. this battles on some Around The Horn shit
n fuck your whore bitch. you prolly never put your face in that box
tryna put that square in that triangle reminds this retard too much of playing w/ blocks
they say that u hot but all he needs is a couple seconds to realize defeat
cuz he about to finish 2nd n end up being the 2nd dead bitch we seen online this week
see, i joined this to prove im still the best so it'd be useless to stop here
it just sucks that ur verses are so '05 beating u will only reiterate that i used to be top tier
it's my time to champ the classic n this fucking guy won't do shit
...you being a Legend of the Summer is definitely Justified but i just wrote the Blueprint
Alvin Karpis:
Deep down you’re soft, there’s no way you’re winning this shit
I bet the voices in your head sound like an out of breath veritas mimicking vic
I pitty this bitch, 1 punch will leave ya face lookin black and blue
You’ll tell everybody you Cottonelle & how I wiped my ass with you
You’re a pussy ginger and your whole style is gay
Now it makes sense how Masaii can smell you from a mile away
Been battling on the net for years & I’ll be honest you’re wack
Joe Webb legacy faded fast so no wonder Christian ponder is back
Dohpe this dohpe that, with votes you always needed a crutch
Deon told joe he’s fat and he’s like ‘tu che De’, nah really you’re sneaky as fuck
You’re like 300lbs of no talent and I’m sick of your pictures
I bet you chant Candyman 3x in the mirror hoping for a twix or a snickers
Joes has zero game, I don’t embellish we can tell he hurts
How the fuck you gonna borrow my jersey & have it looking like a belly shirt?
You’re a soft coward, overhyped, reps gone and lost power
Don’t think you can take netcees by Storm cuz he clowned you off prowlers
& stop riding richard corey and butler, you claim they’re the best right?
Faggot the way you love butt and dick I’m starting to question ya sex life
You have that b-more pride and you’re makin it known
You’re gay and a clone, just another Raven coming out thanks to Simone

Other Hot Lines:

Alvin Karpis vs Beyond
This bitch kicked it friday in fight nights which I still pitty
^I just used a bunch of words with 1 eye so you wouldn’t feel shitty

Joe Metts vs Constrikta
ur chick an ez piece of ass n she get embarrassed when u dining out
cause yall the only couple in history to fit a full length porn on their vine account

Dominate vs Constrikta
I own businesses that own businesses, so liability stays with the entity
Your Limited Parent Company is why u grew up confused about ur racial identity

Constrikta vs Joe Metts
U suck dick to get by, no planning to make me feel scared
Always blow to get where u have to, like u was riding a parapalegic wheelchair

Constrikta vs Dominate
Ya lady sports thongs & push up bras hikin' her titties up
She loves when I pull da string to da side then get off, like it's a city bus

Alvin Karpis vs Philly
Weakest of punches, all yall battles I’m leavin disgusted
Your stock’s been dropping so low Aero wouldn’t even discuss it

God of War vs Philly
ur another dude who likes to pretend, have a seat its time to begin
u'll probably think im ur new doctor phil, when i walk away wit ur wife at the end

Dominate vs ill nik-A
Plus ur 40 w/ zero assets - your Crib Size is woeful as shit g
I haven’t seen such Embarrassing Footage since Delicious Girl posted a strip tease

Allen Knight vs Sharp Nine
no1 wants to be like u faggot, fashion sense is trash u coward
last person that dressed sharp, was his boyfriend after he fucked'em in the ass for hours

Beyond vs Evolve
If I got a girl’s head under the sheets it’s to suck somethin.
If this old fart got a girl’s head under the sheets it’s a Dutch oven.

Orc vs Untold
You only fuck dirty hoes. Syphillis ain't touching me
Ironic dude never hada Kleenex but always needs those when they up & leave

Predictions

Alvin Karpis vs Kin
Alvin Karpis is a two time Summer Classic winner and is in the Hall of Fame. He defeated NYCSpitz(ns), Celph Taut, Swerve, Philly and Beyond then Defeated Joe Metts in the finals to capture the tournament win cementing his place in the Hall of Fame.
I couldn't really find anything text related. He's posted mostly audio like this here http://www.reverbnation.com/itskin/s...une-in-f-breez.
Winner: Alvin Karpis 90/10
KwaL!ty vs Amen
Kwality is a textcee that has been around forever, considered low to mid tier on most sites, I've seen dude go on win streaks and win titles in battlegrounds and pull off upset victories vs very good opponents who mistake him for an easy win.
Amen hails from GoldMic. lol. Shout outs to Hatten and Metaphive tho. Amens experience did not start out well here on Netcees, He went from a brown nosing newbie to an annoying full blown pain in every ones ass in a short while. I gotta give it to him tho, dude is persistent and found a site that would put up with him in RB and has done well enough there, even champing their battle league.
Winner: KwaL!ty/Amen 50/50
Aero vs Blanco Bishop
In the Summer Classic V, Aero forfeited to Split Eight. This self proclaimed GOAT has a bigger reputation for no showing and other antics then he does actually battling, but when he does show he does bring it, it's just a matter of motivation at this point.
I couldn't find anything on this guy. However, I recognize his name from a few sites I've browsed in the past and if I remember correctly he was well respected.
Winner: 80/20 Aero no shows. 60/40 Aero wins if he shows.
Tettris vs Malachi
Tettris was blazing through the NBL and was for awhile the champion until he signed out. He shows all the qualities of a top vet but doesn't have a real tourney win to cement him with the rest of the top vets on Netcees.
Malachi won one of Netcees Newbie tournaments. Here he will have to prove he belongs with the rest of Netcees and shed that Newbie status.
Winner:Tettris 80/20
Beyond vs RudeBoy
Beyond is a Top Tier Hall of Fame battler on multiple sites. It is his attitude that gets him in trouble most of the time and that's what gets him in trouble. Even versus hate votes and tough opponents he always seems to find himself at the top in every tournament and league he enters.
Only thing I found from Rudeboy is a verse vs Bender that showed basic concepts and a rudimentary sense of texting.
Winner: Beyond 90/10
Defiant vs Evolve
Definat is an old head hailing I think from Rap Worlds. He's made the rounds on almost every site that I've posted on. He is another textcee that I've always seen hovering on the brink of being really good, pulling out wins vs tough opponents only to lose the next week to some dweeb.
Evolve in the last Summer Classic came with a pretty good verse against Beyond. He is also highly regarded battler on RB if I am correct.
Winner: Evolve 60/40
hotdogvendorman vs Tic Tac
Deon aka hotdogvendorman is and old respected vet that I have not seen post in a long time. He is highly respected and a member of the once top tier crew doHpe.
Tic Tac is an RB battler I think. He did well for himself in the NBL earning himself a champ match versus Tettris. He has some fresh concepts and will make this interesting I think.
Winner: 60/40 Deon
Constrikta vs Lyfza Gamble
LOL when you first get to Netcees and read Striktas posts you kind of just shake your head and think to yourself "this can't be real life"... but the dude is dope with multiple semi finalist appearances. Dude brings it in his battles with creative concepts and funny punchlines.
Lyfza Gamble is a dude where his only real notoriety is from HHE. HHE was a place where I would call Adjective Punchline concepts thrived among the masses. He's actually a cool dude that has caught a lot of flack here on Netcees. He has a lot to prove and I think he can surprise some people if he actually focuses.
Winner: Constrikta 75/25
Allen Knight vs jilti
Allen Knight is a top tier battler here on Netcees and has made a name for himself recently on Rap Battles. He's consistently good but has never really made a deep showing in the Summer Classic. This might be Allen Knights year.
jilti is an eager to battle new netcee. I only have cypher and 1-2 punches to go off of but he seems to grasp texting at a decent level.
Winner: Allen Knight 90/10
Destroyer vs KnowP
Destroyer is an enigma, on one hand he drops a dope line every once in awhile, on the other he has less then a stellar overall record losing to less than skilled people. His attitude is what gets him in trouble and warrants constant hate. If he brought the same focus he does to his homotextual tendencies he would be a monster.
KnowP is a vet from Rap Battles, from what I have read is super consistent in the battles he actually tries in but always seems to slack off and comes down to the level of his competition. He will need to bring it as Destroyer is more known around these parts.
Winner: Destroyer 60/40
Swerve vs illergicreaxion
I don't know if I know swerve from back in the day but he seems well respected. Do you have any old alias? lol. The one battle I did read I was not that impressed to be honest but I can't go off of just one verse since he gets a lot of props from other talented people.
Illergic is a decent battler who seems to have pretty creative bars but poor wording throughout his verse. If he can pull it all together I think this might be interesting.
Winner: Swerve 70/30
King Karaoke vs Dragon
King Karaoke is a top tier battler, recently losing to Alvin Karpis in the NBL finals. He is searching for that big tournament win to catapult him into the higher echelon of Netcee elites.
Dragon only has one post and it was an open mic that ive read. His writing seems some what impressive but thats all I had to go on. He could be a sleeper or he can just be another Unicorn riding poet writer.
Winner: King Karaoke 85/15
ill nik-A vs The Mind Assassin
ill nik-A another self proclaimed goat, he does however have the statistics to back his claim with many upper echelon victories in the past. However he does not have the tourney wins or notoriety behind them to cement his claim to the throne. Could this be ill nik-A's year?
The Mind Assassin is an assassin of the mind, mind you I've never seen him assassinate anyone on the battlefield of text. He is a respected unicorn rider though and could be a sleeper.
Winner: ill nik-A 85/15
Sharp Nine vs pav
Sharp Nine won the same tournament I was apart of. The Ultimate Writer. He seems to have an impressive record and is one of those battlers trying to climb the ranks.
pav is an old old veteran from braggin writes. He has some impressive victories over some talented people from back in the day. If he can recapture some of his former glory this might be interesting.
Winner: Sharp Nine 60/40
namix vs Greed
I don't think I've read anything from namix before but he seems respected among some of the best talented writers. He is the current owner of Netcees and it should be exciting to read something from him
Greed got butthurt last time I tried to compliment him or something of the sorts. I haven't read much from him but he has the grasp of a decent textcee.
Winner: namix 55/45
Orc vs King Ra.
Orc aka Burden aka Hades is a top tier Hall of Fame battler. Having a shady past many kind of eye him in a different light, but one thing is for certain... the dude is dope. Not only is he dope he brings his own style to battles and not many people can say that in todays scene.
King Ra. is mad creative and is pretty sick in the SnF arena but I've never really read anything straight text from him before. If he can translate his SnF prowess to Text he can make this interesting.
Winner: Orc 85/15

WTF.

John Hensley
This mofo logs on and doesn't join the Summer Classic. Normally I wouldn't give a fuck about an old person dropping by and not participating right away, but, he goes to Braggin Writes and enters into their weak ass tourney. Why you ducking us bro?

Hush
This piece of shit must be bipolar. He went from Hey netcees I wanna revive the Text scene here is my shitty Shadowboxing tourney!! to not even checking into the Summer Tragic to playing off the fact hes modded more text battles then most people to going off saying some stupid shit in "things I would rather do then mod a txt tourney". Bitch make up your damn mind. You did give me your blessing on trying to revive shit around here but still. As a self proclaimed NCG you gotta at least try to keep it 100 or else youre just a fraud. You stay browsing Netcees and shouldve entered the tournament.

Neighbor
Did you run out of gun bars to participate. You ducked Answers tornado and now you think we wouldnt realize you ducking the Summer Classic? come on man. You got time to post threads with bars in title and OP but you don't want to participate?

Dominate
Aero promised me your presence in the Summer Classic. He failed. Again. Divorce is imminent? You should be in the Summer Classic but you decided you can only handle the 1-2 punchline for now. Fuck you, your cool though.

Blue Bayou
Fuck you. Stop coming and going as you please. No one believes you are going to show to anything anymore you bitch. You checked into the Summer Tragic but not into here. Fuck You x2.

Bags
Stay on a permanent hiatus you faggot. Destroyer is more cranky then ever.

Honorable Mentions
God of War, Joe Metts, SiK, Wordz AhGod, Arch. etc. imagine if all of these people signed up? I know most of you are busy and what not but still, Fuck you.

Outro
This years tournament is still pretty dope regardless of certain people not wanting to participate. However it can only be dope if people actually show to their battles. The way I did the bracket was give everyone a rough seeding then tried to match up certain battles farther down the tournament. Example being Alvin Karpis and Tettris, Alvin the current NBL champion and Tettris being the champion throughout most of the Season. Constrikta and Beyond in the same bracket because they have beef. A lot of little beefs and intriguing bouts can happen. Hopefully in the end everyone uses this as motivation to show and type out some dope bars. Good luck everyone!

[Strikta]

Cool mag. Props.

[Allen Knight]

Dope

[StarFaggot]

Alvin Karpis vs Philly
Weakest of punches, all yall battles I’m leavin disgusted
Your stock’s been dropping so low Aero wouldn’t even discuss it

^lol'ed


Constrikta vs Joe Metts
U suck dick to get by, no planning to make me feel scared
Always blow to get where u have to, like u was riding a parapalegic wheelchair

Constrikta vs Dominate
Ya lady sports thongs & push up bras hikin' her titties up
She loves when I pull da string to da side then get off, like it's a city bus

^ Those two by Strikta are just nasty


Hush
This piece of shit must be bipolar. He went from Hey netcees I wanna revive the Text scene here is my shitty Shadowboxing tourney!! to not even checking into the Summer Tragic to playing off the fact hes modded more text battles then most people to going off saying some stupid shit in "things I would rather do then mod a txt tourney". Bitch make up your damn mind. You did give me your blessing on trying to revive shit around here but still. As a self proclaimed NCG you gotta at least try to keep it 100 or else youre just a fraud. You stay browsing Netcees and shouldve entered the tournament

^ lol truth


Dominate
Aero promised me your presence in the Summer Classic. He failed. Again. Divorce is imminent? You should be in the Summer Classic but you decided you can only handle the 1-2 punchline for now. Fuck you, your cool though.

^ I forgot to tell him to join and that I'd write 50% of his lines upon request.



Great mag... Para did his job now its time we do ours.

[big baby]

@Certain spoiled me. I'm used to reading good mags.

[Paradigm]

Originally Posted by big baby

@Certain spoiled me. I'm used to reading good mags.

Oh, word? What can I do differently to appease you Mr. baby?

[big baby]

Originally Posted by Paradigm

Oh, word? What can I do differently to appease you Mr. baby?

you had a few typoes. like your/you're

and the formatting is weird. like the centered thing for the predictions it seems.

set up a template that has a few steps rather tahn bold and underline battler names. So people know what they're reading. idk...contents straight, just needs to be easier on the eyes. makes it seem like it took time, effort. stuff. ye.

[Paradigm]

Word, I'll tidy things up. I'm sick at the moment so I kind of just wanted to get what I had out there.

[King Ra.]

Good shit.

[murda sho]

hope everyone shows, should be dope

[Strikta]

Where u been at dog?

[KnowP]

word. props on the ill mag son. hopefully i can bring enough heat to be mentioned with those other elite punches.

[Alvin Karpis]

cool read, thanks for takin the time

[Destroyer]

lol. this dude hates me

[Blanco Bishop]

Dope mag

[Paradigm]

Originally Posted by Destroyer

lol. this dude hates me

stop being a lame faggot then.

[Destroyer]

I thought I had?
keep calling me a faggot though
it really makes me want to be civil toward you

[murda sho]

Originally Posted by Constrikta

Where u been at dog?

Arby's

[El Muffin]

Sup sho

[El Muffin]

Des just stop the complaining win lose or draw

Shit I even pm u when I think u got robbed

No reason to make threads tho

Just try it out for awhile

Coz what youve been doin understandablygrates on pplz nerves

Not mine

Js

My 2 cents coz I wish u nuthin but the best