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#1 |
The COAT...
Join Date: Jan 2013
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![]() I, to some, appear a mortal man but there's more to that, see
Its a ghastly thorn and bad deeds have borne this banshee The rat-a-tat torment of tapping the door of the mansion Absorbing the blackness of magic too pure to imagine And lavish in the gorgeous advantages it bore in the pattern Still performance in action advances the lore of a champion The type of scorcher amassing panic from born again magic Attack filling corner to corner with lava, straight Mordor the planet Massacre the horrible plans of mankind's co-ordinal masters After cadavers inanimately formless I bellow a chorus of laughter Divorcing the matter, shatter the force of former coroner ashes Blood and gore in my hand, squish a batch to pour on the canvas Typin lines that form into gashes like backs hit with 400 lashes My minds a sword or an axe in the hands of a Nord as he crashes to war In the battle, I'm thwarting your plans using Morrowind tactics Fact is I'm torn between a thirst for grey I claim is my worst of traits I'm still ill as cursed plague, you pricks as sick as a cure for AIDs Work the stage in berserker rage, have you drop quick as ticket purchase rates In French immersion plays during the final curtain phase on its worst of days And if you're not the men I speak and ya best ain't weak you'll send respect to me Leave me blessed with feed that mention E drops flexes deep as inception sleep on it's seventh ZZZZZZZ's The ending speech of Session 3 |
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#2 |
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thanks for the read Nigma, I'll get this tonight
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http://split8.yolasite.com |
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#3 |
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I like this. Very insightful. I thought the start was bit slow, but gradually picked up and I enjoyed it. Multies need a bit of a touch up with making them flow more congruently, but other than that, dude, solid piece of work.
The type of scorcher amassing panic from born again magic Attack filling corner to corner with lava, straight Mordor the planet Massacre the horrible plans of mankind's co-ordinal masters After cadavers inanimately formless I bellow a chorus of laughter Divorcing the matter, shatter the force of former coroner ashes Blood and gore in my hand, squish a batch to pour on the canvas Typin lines that form into gashes like backs hit with 400 lashes The middle piece really stood out to me. |
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#4 |
The COAT...
Join Date: Jan 2013
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Thanks for the feed homie :)
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#5 |
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love the flow in this. Read it out loud. Butter. I couldn't even tell when you were switching schemes.
Still performance in action advances the lore of a champion The type of scorcher amassing panic from born again magic Attack filling corner to corner with lava, straight Mordor the planet Massacre the horrible plans of mankind's co-ordinal masters very clear cut and progressive rhyming, done without regular scheming (as in comma breaks after every rhyme) and the inners/ syllable rhymes were maddd well placed. another thing I personally love using, and see you doing here In the battle, I'm thwarting your plans using Morrowind tactics Fact is I'm torn between a thirst for grey I claim is my worst of traits I'm still ill as cursed plague, you pricks as sick as a cure for AIDs is following up a rhyme with a mixed syllable rhyme... idk if that's the right term, but Slug does it in Scapegoat and it gives your piece this dope feeling of connectedness, like an angry rant. Concepts as well had a very natural stream-consciousness feel, like a freestyle or cypher, and everything fell together like that as well. I just wish it was longer. Content was cool as fuck. Fresh concepts, felt very uniquely Nigma. Made me want to write a flex piece really bad, as well. Glad to have you on board at AOB, and thanks again for the read, b. Keep keyin
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http://split8.yolasite.com |
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#6 |
The COAT...
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Badumpump
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#7 |
Arm the Homeless
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Damn Nigma that was some good shit holmes forreal. I loved the flow of this shit I mean it flows TOO god damn good haha. The multis were bad as hell throughout as well. Like Split said I just wish it was longer fam. Much love on this man
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#8 |
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Sick flow man, top notch. Nothing bad to say about this, each bar connected seamlessly. Loved the Morrowind reference, was smooth as hell.
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#9 |
The COAT...
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Thanks everyone appreciate the feed, I'll have to put nose to grindstone and write a longer verse next time.
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#10 |
SOBER
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A lot of cool rhymes. The first bar was sexual. Although it needed 'that' before 'have' to make sense. This was cool as phuck, tho.
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Netcees 2025 Revivalist Movement Founder |
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#11 |
Senior Member
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Massacre the horrible plans of mankind's co-ordinal masters
After cadavers inanimately formless I bellow a chorus of laughter Divorcing the matter, shatter the force of former coroner ashes Blood and gore in my hand, squish a batch to pour on the canvas Typin lines that form into gashes like backs hit with 400 lashes this was the first time i read anything from you and im impressed. the lines that i pasted were the dopest, the flow was amazing throughout the entire thing, never missed a beat. good shit.
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get high. write rhymes. |
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#12 |
living
Join Date: Jan 2013
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the skyrim references were what actually drew me in.. how fuckin nerdy is that
Absorbing the blackness of magic too pure to imagine i was just reading on in dark matter, and how much of our universe really consists of this substance that we simply cannot seem to detect. and this was reminiscent of that idea even though I'm sure you had no intention of that. Attack filling corner to corner with lava, straight Mordor the planet ha Typin lines that form into gashes like backs hit with 400 lashes My minds a sword or an axe in the hands of a Nord as he crashes to war In the battle, I'm thwarting your plans using Morrowind tactics i feel like this is where you hit a peak. you were pretty consistent regardless but you kinda broke the reigns with these. had me pretty hype man. and, like i said, the elder scrolls references gave me a new sort of viewpoint on the verse. i just started the game so thats probably why. I'm still ill as cursed plague, you pricks as sick as a cure for AIDs idk why but this was dope to me. it was, and i say this honestly, a flip on the oldest punchline in the book that I've never seen before. so kudos. i like how you ended this up too. like it was a fleeting moment in which this lightning struck you. cool man. thanks for this, I've read the pieces you've dropped thus far but never had the chance to drop a thought or two on them. enjoying what you're putting out there. keep on. 1 |
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#13 |
The COAT...
Join Date: Jan 2013
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Really appreciate the in depth feed D, as well as everyone else. Uppin once more <3
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#14 | |
Senior Member
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this was dope man. it was an interesting mix of braggadocio rhyme with elegant writing. It worked somehow.
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#15 | |
The COAT...
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![]() Quote:
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#16 |
Razor-thin derision
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I didn't want it to end; some good, fluid flow geysers in this. One thing I can say about the rhyme schemes was that the placement of the rhyme was sometimes telegraphed too much, like I had a feeling you weren't going to end it, and wham, there's another bar or so continuing the scheme when it may have over-stayed its welcome. This is my opinion just from a reader's perspective, because you could have this perfectly suited for a beat. I think timeliness is something you can work on, to offer something constructive. Know when to end a rhyme scheme and when to electrify the current with other diverse usages. Hit the reader with something they can't see coming.
Nice drop, keep doing you. |
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#17 |
Mic Check
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shits intense bro. ur the other Canadian right?!!?!
obviously u have mad multi skills. we've seen u kill verses like this plenty lots. this content was on some medieval warlord castle magic dragon shit. i feel like you've had verses like this before?? which is totally fine cause i've seen u also completely go off on tons of other topics with pictures right? anyways. u have mad talent i think everyone has crazy respect for your style. i for one just like seeing what kinda scheming you'll come up with next. i Almost wish u would tone down the multis slightly just for the sake of transitioning into a new scheme only because ur so good at comming up with original ones. know what i mean?? i also would LOVE to see u crush just a straight up im better than rapping at you verse lol cause the style of it would be so sick. let me know if u wanna collabo on something like that actually cause i'de be way down for that haha check my new times up drop if u can homie, thanks |
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