Round 1 Magazine

[Sn00p]

Round 1 Magazine



Intro
Whattup y'all. This is Sn00p. I'd like to welcome
all of you to the first iteration of the the tourna-
ment series called The Ultimate Writer. It
is not your usual kind of tournament. No. The Ul-
timate Writer is more than a tournament. It is a
philosophy. It is a new kind of thinking. It is proof
that text can still develop. That there can be new
people fighting their ways up the ranks. That the
online battle scene is still alive. Well, this might
sound a little too ambitious, but keep in mind that
we have eight certified veterans who volunteered
to spend time with sixteen beginners in order to
get them to that next level. When was the last
time that the professionals stopped looking down
on the beginners and embraced them on some
honest (and no homo) shit? I think all of you who
signed up for this have a big opportunity at their
hands. But let's get down to the specifics. Please
read this next section carefully if you're in this
tournament and if you want the best coaching.



How to Get the Tutoring You Deserve
Even the greatest ideas will fail if they're not im-
plemented correctly. There's a German saying that
would translate something like "The Devil is in the
Detail." So please keep in mind these things when
seeking help from your tutors and co-tutees:
#1 Tutors won't write your verses. That's
right. Your coaches will not write your verses,
word them, or provide you with concepts. And
they're not meant to. Because that's your job.
They're here to give you feedback on what you
write and help you improve your writtens. But we
all know that no man will stay fed if you just keep
giving him fish. Teach him to make a net, or how-
ever that metaphor goes. But I'm sure you get it.
#2 Don't expect results without effort. You
won't get help if you simply say, "Uhh, battling XXX,
somebody got some concepts against him?" And
you shouldn't get help for such little effort. Instead,
go out and search for some personals on your op-
ponent. Then brainstorm up some concepts to go
with them and mix some generics in. Then say, "So
I'm battling XXX, I've got these concepts and I'd
word them like this. What do you think?" On a re-
lated note, don't say, "I need help." You yourself
should know what you need help with best. And if
you don't know, read some votes against you,
which you should be doing anyways. For example,
make a thread in your tutoring group saying stuff
like "Well, most people told me I have good con-
cepts, but my wording lacks, which is especially
illustrated in this line: {Put a quote here.} How
can I improve in that area?" So consequently:
#3 Be creative. You have one hell of a
chance here. Your tutors will most likely do every-
thing you ask them for, but you have to ask them.
If you've always wondered how to get past Wri-
ters' Block, now is the time to ask for some stra-
tegies. If you feel like discussing setups and rhyme
schemes, I'm sure your tutors will have something
to say. So use this chance you were given. But:
#4 Don't forget to have fun. This is YOUR
tourney. You get to know other members and some
vets at that. You should probably get their AIM
screen names to just have a chat with them. It'll
help too. And don't forget that battling itself should
be fun after all. And everything's more fun when you
get better at it. This is your chance. Just use it.

I'm sorry if I was a bit long-winded there. I'm just
trying to help. Oh, and if you've wondered why your
tutors are your tutors, then read the next section:



Tutor Verses
—Good Examples to Follow—
Here, I will present you a verse from each of the
four tutors. Those are great verses and you can
definitely take them as examples. Maybe even dis-
cuss them with your tutors, because they can tell
you something about them for sure, and they can
also tell you why these verses are that good. They
might not be the respective battler's best verse
ever, but they illustrate different aspects of battling
quite well. So get your pens out and take notes!

namix vs. Egotistical
Kid hopes for a rap career?!
…I simply just find this question stunning, Wire you going about it?
Ego only shocks me when i put metal objects in his emotional outlet
this dick will never measure up against me, he’s short and i’m big
i’d mention the fags love life but thats all folks, like porky the pig
i bet ur almost done with ur verse…cuz the stench is lingering fast
i’d never thumb thru ur work, get your boyfriend to finger that ass
‘n fuck the newbie groupies who-keep pretendin this faggots mean
they can follow the rainbow, but i get skittles in vending machines
it could be as simple as 1, 2, 3..but in plain English im way too ill
so dont count on a win…cuz uno, dose, u dont have a tres of skill
I get arrogant after a kill...and I knew my knife was goin to boast
cuz my blade really got Egotistical...after it Pride open his throat
hope ur jottin down notes, cuz ya livin garbage like oscar the grouch
if ur skills even Remote, it must be hidden somewhere under a couch
though our records wont relate after this, i’ll still find him 'n I alike
cuz mine will be a good 4-nothing, ‘n he’s been that his entire life!

God of War vs. ill nik-A
you should of run out of life before david put out tha site
i mean your such an old timer, you prolly go ding when you wind down at night
and forget your crack buzz, or any of your whack drugs
its funny that you have more lines in your face, then any of your fuckin bags does
plus i never fuckin liked dude, your whole persona is trife to
u'd think i put your body out to sea nik,when thats the route they have to take to find you
you hold ur lunch in a paper sack,since u cant afford the best food
the only time id carry a brown bag, is if your mom passed out on the way to the bedroom
this fagots lost it, no one can grasp his nonsense
you ask for so many pink slips, that your posts is starting to match your closet
all he does is fuckin cry, ive champed the nbl uve shunned it twice
i mean you act so salty when you type, your raft must of flipped over a hundred times
u cant compare my tracks with, the fuckin heir of whackness
cuz you wont ever leave me beatnik, even if you were a child in the era of that shit
ima go ham n stop, cuz i dont really wanna damage pops
since the last time a bitch fucked with this cuban, she was at a sandwich shope
your always on the baby shit, all that whining makes me sick
i mean you cry so much,i thought you supermodded at rb under that as an alias
n u being a family man is so true, n thats a reason to boast dude
cuz your so short and stumpy, that you probably have roots everywhere u go to
your just another clown kid, plus your to old to count bitch
i bet your friends call you a little rascal, since thats what u ride around ur house with
and i dont wanna hear his moans, i jus want this queer to know
the diference between us is im 6 from thirty,and you hit that shit 10 years ago
i hit 20 n new i had this fucker ripped, put in a slumber quick
soon as you hit 20, you put a new piece on the stem so u could haved another hit
n every line is a slaugher, someone should remind him of honor
cuz we wasnt surprised to see u duck, after ur family spent so much time on the water
ive finished this verse, after i diminished his birth
and put nik in the ground, like i threw a punch and fucking indented the dirt

ill nik-A vs. Blue Bayou
Beat me at RM & swagger n flow; Wow u really been killin me yo
But guess I'ma need a lotta gas, food, water, compass & hikin boots... far as ur credibility goes
u silly ass hoe, stuck on the past but u nothin special to me, man
cuz if I bring Blue to the present... Yall know blow is just part of my weekend
ure a poor excuse for a battler so nigga don't jerk
I challenged u to a pink slip & it was like ur dog ate ur answer... after he finished ya home work
take a stab at ur eyes, one at ya nose & two in ur throat
It would be a classic death... sorta like if he knew that u were in dohpe
So faggot, u oughtta hope… that I rather just pump led
But if I take a shot at u... forensics will find blood splattered all over beyonds bed
how can u think u’ll beat me when u aint fuckin shit yo
u didn't only lose ur head it was the stunt double for the sacrifice scene in Apocolypto
its fucken simple, stress free & plus wont bother my life
cuz I take this with a grain of salt… while u on a road with no brakes covered in ice
& remember when u changed ya name thought it’d alter ur traits & stuff
BUT the way ur styles evolved since then... u'll always be known as Ayp to us
u fake as fuck, peeped ya pic vs DLB & its a true banter
but whats funnier is how that crack whore managed to get on the set of Zoolander
Seriously last week u bolded a word how the fuck can this dude be tight?!
…I should make u write a 500 word essay on how that shit’s so noobie-like

Orc vs. Sound
know bout ya life. lemme go getcha file up.
if my verse drives ya crazy..
.. don't worry, wont this be ya 2nd time in a mental asylum?
hold uppp quick. i'ma blow ya cover son.
ain't sorry u lost fam in virginia tech. i'm just sorry u weren't one of them.
i KNOW y u ain't show gainst hens. i'ma drop several facts.
wrote ya verse n' showed me lines. i was like 'roflz yo..u gonna need better than that'.
verses aint dope. they lackin im thunder.
closest you got to Fresh. was phone sex AFTER u asked for her numberrr.
it's out now. even if ya drop better text, b.
ima win. cuz i WONT lose to a guy who said he LOVED a bitch he met on netcees.
hahaha. ayo, u'll show up - found dead.
i came here to Cane u.. but Lefty done that in the 'u know what sound' thread.
got told shit that'll give ya uncomfortable times.
i KNEW ya faked ur death.. i didnt know ya done it cuz ya bit multiple times.
plus, this is mine. ur losing for sure.
how Hush gonna tell me ur outta CLASH before he told YOU that you were?!
sounds a gent. nvr cheatin or nothing, damn.
so ayo plz explain y your girlfriend cheated on YOU with another man?
when she pop'd out a kid u were seething, shit.
..& now he got a daycare life. sound STAY raising other peoples kids.
u ain't posted in days. fucking hide kid.
if you do finally show ya face.. just remember ur sons looks nothing like it.
u had succesful surgery. i noticed the tension.
cuz we weren't waiting on a Sound recovery.. we were hoping against it.

[Sn00p]

Goddammit, that was a lot of text. So here are
some videos to refresh yourself from those walls:









Back? Good. That dude in those videos may be
fucking awesome, but now it's time for some...



Predictions

Genocide vs. King Keith
An interesting battle, because both are known
as topical cats who try to convert their styles
to the battling steeze. Even though this is a
match between a 1 seed and a 4 seed, this is
probably closer than what most might think.
I still have Genocide here, but if King Keith can
apply what he learns fast, I can see him pulling
off an upset here and going far in the tourney.

Utmost vs. Malachi
Utmost is my sleeper pick to win it all. He has
a cool and refreshing style and seems to have
a lot of very creative ideas. If he can flip them
right, he's a force to be reckoned with. But Mal
isn't bad either. He's one of the newer guys I
can see elevating fast. Will it be enough to over-
come a (seemingly) more experienced opponent
here? I don't think so, but I do think that Mal's
someone who could definitely prove me wrong.

Meth vs. Camp Bell
Even though Meth entered the tourney late as
a replacement for the late Obey, he is one of
the guys to watch in this. He has been doing
text for some time and already developed his
style. But can he make it past that mid-tier level
and start hanging with the big boys? First he
has to get past Camp Bell, which I think he can.
Camp Bell is one of the people I can see learn
a lot from this. But on the other hand, he's
just not as experienced, so I have to say Meth.

Witty vs. Anonymous
Both are more than decent writers, and this is
probably one the closer battles around. I can
see both winning, and I expect both to come
with good verses. This is one of the battles
that could end up as the battle of the week.
It really comes down to who can improve the
most with what his tutors offer him as advice.

SiK vs. ZenLand
SiK can slack at times. He is one of the (some
will say 'the') best in this, but if he underesti-
mates his opponents, he has some rather old
ideas. I'm not hating on him, because I'm sure
that he just hasn't seen those lines before, but
his downfall is really him not thinking out of the
box like I think he has the potential to. That
might be ZenLand's chance. Because even tho
Zen seems like a really cool guy, I doubt that
he's on SiK's level right now. But then again, I
haven't seen Zen battle too much, so maybe
he can prove us all wrong. If he really tries
here, I see no reason why he shouldn't do it.

Rayge vs. Flo Real
Flo is a cool new boarder. He seems to have
some good ideas too. He just needs a little
polishing to make his bars hit harder. That's
where his tutors come into play. Rayge is a
kinda similar story, because he can hit hard,
but maybe he could learn to be a bit more
creative. I think Rayge got the battling style
down more, so I got him, but I expect Flo to
really come with some ideas & put up a fight.

Sharp Nine vs. Jah Homie
Sharp is quite funny in roasts and if he can
transfer that to his verses, he can go far in
this. Some people have been saying that Jah
is Gamble though, who is not too bad at text.
So this could end up as a quite interesting
matchup that's hard to predict. I think I still
got Sharp here, because he can make people
laugh and that's a big plus in battles. But Jah
might just come with it and steal the win.

bleak vs. Boredom
This is quite the battle. Boredom is Alphabet,
a dude who has been around for some time.
He managed to win a Newbie Tourney on NC,
so he knows what he has to do. But bleak is
one of the cats that just need a little push to
really get to that next level. The question is
whether bleak will be able to do that in time to
defeat Boredom. Or can Boredom use his ex-
perience for himself & come out as the winner?



Winning Odds
—Place Your Bets on the Tourney Winner—

Team God of War
Sharp Nine: 2-1
bleak: 3-1
Malachi: 4-1
ZenLand: 4-1

Team ill nik-A
Meth: 2-1
Witty: 3-1
Flo Real: 4-1
King Keith: 4-1

Team Orc
SiK: 1-1
Rayge: 2-1
Boredom: 2-1
Camp Bell: 4-1

Team namix
Genocide: 2-1
Utmost: 2-1
Anonymous: 3-1
Jah Homie: 4-1



Outro
Don't get demotivated by those odds. If you want to
know why, just ask your tutors about the underdog
effect. Also, what I'm looking forward to in this tour-
ney most aren't the easy wins. It's the upsets and the
people elevating fast. Oh, and even if you lose your
1st round, don't feel too bad about it. There might be
a surprise waiting for you. So keep in mind what
I told you here and be good tutees and listen to your
tutors. Good luck in your battles. See you next week.

[Utmost]

haha dope shit Sn00p. shout outs to the assistant coaches as well

[Allen Knight]

dope mag bro

[bleak]

well done.

Me vs. Boredom for BOTW

[Flow]

Sweet stuff fam. I like my odds, any takers?

[namix]

Really nice mag, Sn00p. Great throwback verses too, lol.

How were those odds generated, just out of curiosity?

[Fart]

Dope
You failed to use the better banner I made :(

[Split]

Originally Posted by Artemus

Dope
You failed to use the better banner I made :(

link me

also i want to interview u

[Geno]

Yho, dope ass mag. Just saw this shit. Ill verses from the gods.
Knew about the three cats other than namix. But to read a namix verse and see how dope dude can be was pretty damn interesting. Ill shit

Good looks for a sick mag.
Geno 1-1 tho lol

[Sn00p]

Originally Posted by namix

How were those odds generated, just out of curiosity?

I made them up, judging the people by my impression of them and their verses. Some might be a little inaccurate. lol

Originally Posted by Artemus

Dope
You failed to use the better banner I made :(

Yep, I'mma switch 'em up to keep things interesting, tho. This week, it's Banner 1, next week, it's yours.

[namix]

Originally Posted by Genocide

Yho, dope ass mag. Just saw this shit. Ill verses from the gods.
Knew about the three cats other than namix. But to read a namix verse and see how dope dude can be was pretty damn interesting. Ill shit

Good looks for a sick mag.
Geno 1-1 tho lol

man i feel bad you ended up on the one dude's team you didn't know! well shit, my hiatus was probably longer than I tend to think.

I been gearing up for battle mode lately though - so i won't let you down bro. You got a strong shot to wins this, especially once we really try -- no lie.

[namix]

ill nik-a --- you were in the RBL in '03-'04 right? if so, wassup hommie! glad you're still holding it down, if you are who i think you are, you kept breaking into the top 10 at a time when a lot of heads these days woulda struggled to crack the top 30 forum (when there were constantly over 100 people in the league haha, crazy shit). liked the classic reference - man, i remember when they made dohpe, i can't believe that shit is still around... they used to be like the mini-me's of mine and butler's crew, but survived much much much longer apparently lol... good to see you hommie


Orc --- your swag is just straight cool man, i've always appreciated heads that can do that -- the point-blank shit that I would make the mistake of "over-complicating" (especially back in the day - but even today i wouldn't pull that approach off the same way)... an easy/breezy read and personal as hell -- a feel that you're just stating a bunch of facts that are relevant to your opponent having already clowned themselves through actual events. it was that kind of style that would beat me back in the day when i'd go to new sites, and it took me years to understand why -- but there is something to be said about that 'writers voice' that screams 'your getting sonned' best... dope shit man.

God of War --- haha, hell yes. THAT is the style that never left..... Great wording, personal but not so much so that someone who isn't around for the personals can't appreciate it -- good wordplay but seamlessly integrated into well executed punches. Funny, yet not so funny you sacrificed 'your edge'. strong conceptual expansion -to make even what starts as a basic idea that other 'good' writers have really transform into something of its own.

"your such an old timer, you prolly go ding when you wind down at night"
^bwahaha - comedy.


respect fella's - good shit all of you.

Cool

[Dominate]

Nice mag @Sn00p