WEEK 4 CHAMP MATCH: UNIVERSE 3-0 vs MMLP 2-1 UNIVERSE WINS

[Adverse]

AOWL Season IX


Verse Due: FRI DECEMBER 11th @ 11:59PM EST


Line min: 10

Max: 50


Rules:http://www.netcees.org/showthread.php?t=145451[/b]

Topic:



Good luck!

[Universe]

Check

[MMLP]

Check

[Universe]

The Depths of You

*80 line max, as agreed upon

"Yes: I am a dreamer. For a dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world." - Oscar Wilde

......

Lower Level - Cobb

I'm in daydreams of a giant, David with Goliath's head on a thin post
Desperate to know if the window to the soul can be entered when it's closed
But if lofty goals require ladders, Interstellar stars are the door
Power of suggestion becomes part of the norm when it's too hard to ignore
The Following Memento's an artform, uncanny valley's resemble you best
But I didn't expect to scale the face of a mountain in a literal sense
Insomnia's next, give it a rest - I'm not gonna lie just for sleep
Beauty's in the eye of the beholder... I walked inside it to see
Climbed your steep peak for a sneak peek, excuse dialect that I choose
But unless IMAX'd I can't tell you how I intend to be viewed
I went in like transorbital lobotomies, removed all doubts and booby traps
Took a glimpse into your mind's eye and carved out the newest path
Found those Prestigious top hats... God knows I just lost it
If our artist didn't forget the nostrils I'd do a nosedive right off this
I see shapes in clouds, faces in mountains - each step a proof of concept
But with pareidolia, I had twisted perceptions of lucid objects
I felt the spinning top in my pocket... no one can snatch this totem loose
Bats echoed and flew passed as I entered the catacombs of you...


Upper Level - Arthur & Nash

The Subject snoozed on a barcalounger, he might be asleep for the night
Wires link his arm to a portable Somnacin intravenous device
Which lead to Cobb - out cold in a chair on the other side of the room
Nash monitored vital signs and fine-tuned his tie and his suit
Arthur paced the perimeter watching closely, he came equipped
Stopping sounds escaping lips by filling the Subject's nose with nasal strips
Nash sneeringly quipped, "It's nice we got time to help him breathe a bit..."
Arthur replied, "Last thing we need is congestion... or God forbid, a sneezing fit"
Nash said, "The sedative will keep him in LA LA land 'til we find the secret"
"It stands to reason if he wakes his subconscious can't quite retrieve it"
"Cobb's planting ideas too deep then," Arthur said, "Or Mal decided to make the trip..."
"Wait a minute," Nash interjected, "you told me his wife wouldn't be placed in this...?"
"We're planting the idea of an idea," Arthur spit, "the job's to deliver and store..."
"In his memory bank, without him knowing Cobb's been there before"
"Give him the warning..." Arthur ordered as he sat by the Subject's side
Nash aligned himself with Cobb and held a flashlight up to his eyes...


Lower Level - Cobb

I plodded along the caverns of your mind like there's a story to find
This borders on crime, but it's all just familiar territory inside
A bright glare turned blinding white... I wait for the sight to fade
Time's a wasting; The Dark Night always gives way to the light of day
A flight of stairs Rises; I can't stay on ground floors of your grasp
So I sprint toward the blinding light, racing down the corridor fast
Something's recording my actions... I ran up crumbling staircases of rot
Kicked through barricades at the top and found rare safes left unlocked
Grabbed the spinning top from my pocket - this little one hit wonder of tests
"At least your open to suggestions..." I mumbled under my breath
Placed it in an empty safe and spun it... Click. I locked it up quick
Comforted when I heard the whirring of a spinning top from within...


Upper Level - Arthur & Nash

The Subject's facial muscles twitched - a new idea committed to weary thoughts
"It takes merely seconds to feel results," Nash said, "if the sedative's wearing off..."
Arthur checked his watch, music blared, he knew then the end is close
As Edith Plath's 'Non, je ne regrette rien' grew to a crescendo...


Lower Level - Cobb

Heard the opera music and rushed to the exit; the stairs broke to the ground
I stepped to the edge of the eye and looked around... Nowhere to go but down...


Upper Level - Arthur & Nash

The Subject was groaning now... Waking up slowly from within the abyss
"We're out of time," Arthur quickly admits, "Give him the kick..."
Nash lifts Cobb off the chair, throwing his center of gravity off-kilter
Seems no matter how deep the dream, everyone has to sleep with a filter...


Lower Level - Cobb & Mal

Amidst falling debris I heard, "Phillipa and James are on the other side for us"
Mal stepped up, "You're waiting for a train..." I just shut my eyes and jumped...


Upper Level - Cobb, Arthur & Nash

Cobb plunged to the tile with a thud, he once was in limbo with kids
Others may have infinite trips but there's a definite limit to his
The Subject was regaining consciousness; Nash moved furniture around the room
Arthur turned down the music; "Everything's secure," Cobb said, "now let's move"
He yanked loose wires from his suit - Arthur wiped fingerprints clean
Nash quickly packed up the portable Somnacin intravenous machine
"It wasn't that deep of a sleep," Cobb said, "but Mal seems to be routine"
"Next time we need to go lower - I'm talking a dream within a dream"
The team leaves the apartment - We should be debating on what Cobb said
But the Subject wakes up with a long stretch, shaking off the cobwebs
His dream fading from consciousness... He's suddenly optimistic of the future
He mulls something over, rubs his nose, taking a seat in front of his computer
One useful word written on his keypad... he smiles at new visions
A guy of superstition, he picked up the phone and dialed a few digits
An all consuming idea brewing... A voice answered, quite exuberant
"Christopher Nolan! As I live and breathe... How's my favorite screenwriter doing?"
"I can't complain... I have a script idea I'd like to talk to you about"
"Are you kidding?" The voice exclaimed, "For you I can option it right now..."
He knew it would be bought without doubt in the recess of his brain
Already had characters with all their names, and an ending left unexplained
He doesn't trace where it comes from, but somehow he always finds a way
So he starts to type at length under 'INCEPTION' on the title page...


FADE IN:

DAWN. CRASHING SURF.

The waves TOSS a BEARDED MAN onto wet sand. He lies there...

https://m.imdb.com/title/tt1375666/

[MMLP]

The clouds part in the distance as the title credits soar.
The writings on the wall before Bart can finish lines up on the board.
Arriving at the dawn of new clear day with Homer asleep.
Nobody sees their lives are more animated than the opening scenes.
But heres poor old little Lisa, slumped on the edge of her bed,
cutting a lonely demeanour while resting her head.
With the compression reflecting her own shortcomings
on the set of an episode that no-one saw coming.
Homer’s punishment for his slip of the tongue,
as she hoped for something she didn’t wish to discuss.
Usually The Simpsons would come together in their humble abode
but when her sniffles begun, she suffered alone.
There was nothing but groening as she lay inside the bed,
curled up in a snowball too, just stayed behind and wept.
Now her way of life’s affected in such a humbling way
and would create a minor threat that she couldn’t escape.
Before this nothing would faze her, she was bettering her life.
With a brother she hated to love who’d never leave her side.
The essence of her mind, witty and eloquent
All set to be a bride and rinsing the benefits.
Fast-thinking, a feminist with a part in management
Quick and intelligent, smart and passionate.
a hardened naturalist who by nature, blossomed.
As sharp and sassy as the sax she’s rocking!
Always laughing comically with those who drew the closest
but all that was gone in the moment the news had broken.
Soon we’d notice what nobody had witnessed.
This gloom, unknowingly had broke her resistance,
soon the focus had shifted and now turning on her dreams.
As her hopes and her wishes then burns to smithereens.
The burden for this teenager, looking scared and unprepared
Returning to the screens with a thin blue line like her mother’s hair.
She couldn’t bear it at first, she renounced the challenge
Completely unaware without the four-sight of Millhouse’s glasses.
Now counter balanced and toting the purse
Out of character but no longer deterred.
It had bottled her personality and all that jazz,
So began following Murphy’s law and start playing the sax.
It was her way to relax, always learning from her mom,
she came to the dance so sturdily and strong.
A maturity beyond her years with nothing to hide.
To journeying across the world with the love of her life.
And as husband and wife they pedalled along,
both looking to rise ahead of the crop.
Together they hopped on the property ladder
but never forgot what honestly mattered.
In a hope to recapture the magic they booked
and dropping a chapter in the labours of love.
On the same page from the jump til the tragedy came round.
Then insanity struck and now shes playing cat and mouse,
surveying the surroundings whilst resting in a trance.
She mistakenly allowed the tension to enhance.
No message for the family in an attempt to disguise it.
Apprehension had amassed with all the effort in trying,
in being extensively silent as the highs were replaced.
As the depth of excitement had declined in a day
Would align in adjacent with the paranoia she built.
So after nine months of labour those joys were fulfilled
one last void to be filled, and be a mother at last.
Is it a boy or a girl was what all of them asked
Sadly it wouldn’t of mattered, with this emotional girl torn,
she finally got the courage to stand and look over her still born…

[Candy]

universe:
man i loved it, the dream steps one two was dope and done well, it flowed nice and processed itself at a natural rate.. the story was super cool and your vocab was calm and hot.. all in all a great piece my main man thanks.. even the characters were cool..

mmlp:
dude the simpson thing was dope i mean a little childish on some flipped lines but pothers just really worked for you.. smithereens. was the pay off i think because it made it worth all the name drops.. rhyming and structure was actually your best front man you one uped universe on that.. all in all though it was a lil to simple for such a massive drop from universe.. cool story though bra..

vote = universe just a lil more depth to it gl guys

[Pharaohs Army]

Universe
An interesting Inception piece.
Your flow and rhyme are on point as usual.
I was a little confused as to what Arthur and Nash were trying to accomplish, but other than that I followed pretty well. I have seen the movie. And the end is an interesting loop of the idea for the screenplay.
This wasn't as gripping as some of your past stories (to me), but it still did the job in entertaining and wanting to see what comes next. Will be tough to beat.

MMLP
Was a big Simpsons fan in their earlier days so I caught all the wordplay references: groening, snowball, burns to smithereens, and a few others.
We are presented with a Lisa growing up and getting married, but dejected for some reason-- we only find out at the end with the stillborn shocker.
Flow and rhymes on point as usual.
You did a good job describing her character and traits and aspirations.
You have been facing top notch competition because AGAIN although I kinda want to vote for you here, I just think Universe had a really complete and developed story and he matched you from a technical standpoint.

So that said, V Universe, but I expect MMLP to rebound and eventually have another champ match if he keeps it up.

[Master Rock]

Universe, upon second read it became more apparent and his opening line didn't strike me but next line tapped me. Interesting thing is you have to read it twice for the beginning to make sense to you if you have a love for the particular directorial style of a director of cinema. First part is a dedication to the film maker. However, I understand that back and forth but I was not quite feeling the initial disruption, it broke me away from the vibe and I am all about the vibe. However, after it becomes more cohesive in nature to to product. The ending didn't touch me as much, is it a true story because I have no idea? But it is an interesting take, no the less.
Now MMLP,
right off the back I question what is up what this opening Simpson line (like this better not be no random toss in). But it wasn't, I entertained by the progression and the references throughout. Plenty of calculated metaphoric jabs in wordplay throughout. However, once her journey of the world took place the world that painted began to fade (now can that relate to the topic at hand on how the fun, colorful world dries out and begins to fall?). What is most intriguing is that Lisa (I would assume) has broke from the childhood dream and met the tragic fate the reality can present with can take the color out of the world and leave you feeling hollow to tears.
This was very difficult at first to decide my vote but upon further reflection the end is reflected in MMLP's work while the beginning is formulated in Universe's verse.
Therefore I am giving it to MMLP due to the story of color diminishing into a grey fade of hollowing.

[Mr. J]

This was an interesting battle to judge. Both dope drops.

Uni, your verse had some dope ideas layered into it, I really enjoyed the concept as well, what really caught my eye was how it was structured, wasn't too sure what you had going on at first but after giving it some time to sink in I felt like the direction you took really struck the topic on its head, its not too often someone uses their pieces in the way you did. In fact I remember doing so but color coordinating who and how they presented themselves, it kind of reminded me Dante's Inferno, which is pretty neat. Dope piece.

LP, you really toyed with this topic to your preferences and it makes the piece much easier to read, your rhymes are structured in a way that makes it smooth as you progress throughout, really enjoyed some of the references you had littered throughout too,. Made the piece worthwhile and enjoyable.

V/both brought their A-game here and made this battle a tough one to pick a winner on, Uni brought a crazy structured piece but the centering of it kind of made me go crosseyed so I'm going to mark that up as a negative on your behalf, LP brought some nice material as well and reminded me of something Lars would do within his piece, but under his guidance it's no surprise to see it leak into your work. I think you would have benefited from breaking it apart the way Uni did. It could help, or not. I'm not too sure at this point.....

Anyway I feel like both deserve to be put in this position and will make next week interesting but I'm going to give it to Universe on this one for bringing not only a strong piece, but for keeping me enjoy the read slightly more than LP's. Nice work fellas. Gotta give it to Universe