ha my cousin Jimbo tho...llol

[Ghost1]

lol...some of you may or may not remember I had posted about ole bull jim in a previous thread....for those of you that don't....small recap and also vital info for incoming post.....jim is retarded. like idk....my family says he slow....I mean he drives...works...talks....but he like 25 and got the mind of a 9 year old. hes also like 6ft 250lb. hes terrifying. ok


so...yesterday afternoon I took a day off from work to run some errands

im like yoooo.....BING BONG DOOR RINGS...its like noon....on a Tuesday.....WHO THE FUCK IS THIS? TRY TO PEEK OUT SIDE CURTAIN BUT THIS BABOON MUSTVE BEEN HOVERING ON THE DOOR HARD AS FUCK...SO I GO AROUND AND TRY TO CREEP BUT MY FRONT DOOR TOP HALF IS GLASS SO HE SEE ME INSTANTLY AND I SEEN THIS DIMLY LIT CHILDS EYES WIDEN AND HE STARTS POINTING AT ME LIKE.....PEEK A BOO ITS YOUR MILDLY RETARDED COUSIN AT YOUR DOOR STEP HOLDING A 6 PAC OF BUSCH TALL BOYS////LITERALLY IT WOULDVE BEEN BETTER NEWS IF AN UZI WAS AT THE DOOR AND WHEN I ANSWERED IT THE ENTIRE CLIP WENT OFF INTO MY FACE AND CHEST. SO IM LIKE YO JIM.....UH...I THOUGHT WE TALKED ABOUT THIS HOMIE...AN HE JUST DOIN THIS LAUGH...LIKE U KNO....LIKE HOW LIKE FAT PEOPLE AND DORKS OR OVERLY EXCITED PEOPLE DO...LITTLE DROOL ON SIDE LIP....HE INTERRUPTS ME IMMEDIATELY...WANT TO GO FOR A RIDE?!??! NOTICING THAT THE 6 PACK HES HOLDING IS FULL....YET HE IS HOLDING A SEPERATE CAN...ONE CAN ONLY ASSUME A SEPERATE 6 PACK HAS ALREADY BEEN CONSUMED.......................................... .... SO I RESPOND SKEPTICALLY.....JIM HOW THE FUCK DID THEY GIVE YOU A DRIVERS LICENSE? ARENT YOU RETARDED>? HE JUST LOLS AGAIN...HE THEN TRAMPLES INTO MY LIVING CASTING ME ASIDE ....OH YEA COME ON IN YOU FUCKING FREAK OF NATURE SMH. SO WE ARE TALKING....I LET HIM PLAY WITH SOME FORKS THAT WERE LAYIN ON THE TABLE. THIS SEEMS TO BE HOLDING HIS INTEREST PRETTY WELL....TO MY RELIEF. MEANWHILE IM TRYING TO CONTACT HIS DAD....TO COME AND RANGLE THIS CREATURE BACK UP....I HAVE BUSINESS TO ATTEND TO....I CANT BE BABYSITTING THIS INSANELY DANGEROUS MORON TODAY. GET UNC ON THE PHONE......DIRECT QUOTE//// FUCK YOU. IM NOT RUNNING A CONCESSION STAND.///END QUOTE. HUH?!?! COME PICK UP THIS SAVAGE RETARD U BUMBLING IDIOT. PHONE HANGS UP. BEAUTIFUL. RETARD SENIOR WITH THE DROP KICK TO MY DICK. SO....THIS WHOLE TIME I WAS OUT ON THE PORCH AND THIS CREATURE INSIDE DOING GODKNOWS WHAT SO I GO BACK IN TO SEE WHAT THIS KID IS UP TO.........SURELY HES WEIGHING OUT ATLEAST A QP OF SUM REGGIE MILLER.....IF THAT. JIM WTF IS THIS?!?!? SHIT DONT EVEN LOOK LIKE WEED. SOME YO ON 13TH ST PROLLY RIPPED THIS POOR SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD OFF AND SOLD HIM PREGANO AND ASBESTOS/ SO IM LIKE....CLEAN THIS FUCKING MESS UP U PIECE OF SHIT. U NOT STAYING HERE LONG. THEN HE LIKE......YO I COPPED THIS PIECE THE OTHER DAY.....IM LIKE HUH? YOURE A PIECE BRO....THEN LIKE CLINT EAST WOOD MY DUDE WHIPS THIS FUCKING CANNON OUT OF HIS SHIT STAINED SWEATS...WAVING THE SHIT ARPUND....OK BROS....I DONT SAY THIS OFTEN....BUT I WAS LEGITIMATELY SHAKEN///// IVE SEEN, SHOT, HANDLED GUNS PLENTY BEFORE.............BUT UNDERSTAND THE MINDSTATE OF THE USER HERE....SO HERE IS JIMBO IN ALL OF HIS GLORY....HALF BENT OFF BUSCH TALL BOYS, WEIGHING OUT PIECES OF CARPET HE THINKS IS WEED WHILE WAVING AROUND THIS 6 SHOOTER TALM BOUT HE HASNT BEEN TO HIS WAREHOUSE JOB IN 2 WEEKS/.///../ JIM....BRUH/.// THINGS ARE GETTING OUT OF HAND ......THEN THE DOOR../...AGAIN. THE FUCK NOW.....ITS THE COPS...LMFAOOAOOO....IM LIKE JIM THE COPS ARE HERE......WHY ARE THE COPS HERE JIM.....HE JUMPS UP FROM THE TABLE.....LEAVING IT CRUMPLED IN HIS PATH...FLYS THRU THE KITCHED IN A RETARDED STREAK OF BRILLIANCE....OUT THE BACK DOOR.......I ANSWER FRONT DOOR....COPS HELLO......BLAH BLAH WE ARE LOOKING FOR JIM ETC.....HIS CARS OUT FRONT...HAVE YOU SEEN HIM ETC....WE HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE THAT HE ASSAULTED THIS WOMAN SEXUALLY ETC ETC ETC

IM LIKE HE GONE YO

SO

I HAVENT HEARD FROM JIM TODAY AT ALL

IM A LITTLE BIT CONCERNED BECAUSE HIS CAR WAS GONE THIS MORNING







DISCUSS?

[Diode]

why are you concerned

this hooligan getting locked up is a best case scenario for bags making it to 40

[Ghost1]

my concern is more so for the rest of the free world....

im sure they will get him though

[Diode]

btw i thought this was about uhoh da gawd aka original jimbo

[Ghost1]

theyre essentially the same person but my cousin just acts how uh oh thinks.

[Ghost1]

congrats on the rape tho jim

[Amen]

How long did it take for the cops to arrive?

How long was he there?

These are important questions that need answers. I'd like to know what time this police department is clocking when responding to emergency's.

Where they following him? Did someone call them? Maybe your Uncle?

Answer these questions.

[Witty]

Lmao I remember the last jimbo story...this was equally as pleasing. I died.

[Blanco Bishop]

Sounds like the cops saved u from getting sodomised at gun point.


Win for u.

[PancakeBrah]

word i took yesterday off to do errands and move too.

lol'd @ gave him a fork

[veritas]

Nothing about this is funny. Plus you showed a complete lack of honor. Allow the veracity of this claim to drain all of the ego boost You thought you got from this post.

[Split Eight]

Big retard Jim to thread

[Split Eight]

there was a big retard Jim at the grocery store I worked at in high school. Also about 6'5". Pudgy face, middle schooler glasses, strong male pattern baldness.

all the managers shat on him cause he was like 35 and still riding his mountain bike to work in an apron, making $11/hr to make customers really uncomfortable with his discretion in placing the eggs and the raw meat

one day he finds out I like cars. All of a sudden I can't escape his small talk about cars. Now this dude, as previously mentioned, did not posses a license, so all of his stories of cars involved him doing mouthbreather impressions of them driving by at approximately 95 dB

He's always asking me about where I think cops are the worst. I've come to realize that he's just regurgitating whatever small talk he's exposed to in the bagging lane/ 40 years of car reconaissance missions, boiled down to red-faced impression of a Trans Am with a glasspack

Eventually he gets down to brass tacks and asks me "So what's your favorite street to speed on?" I tell him Farm St, this real windy road on the way home from work

He gives me the sternest retard face he could muster and goes "Some kid got killed by a speeder on Farm Street a few years ago. That's no good". and never says a word to me again

[veritas]

He is an angel, and brought you to punish land, sharp.