"The Pick Up Basketball Game of Death"

Vulgar · 03-29-2014, 10:49 AM

.

NYCSPITZ · 03-29-2014, 11:27 AM

lmfaooooooo!!!

CopyPat · 03-29-2014, 03:47 PM

haha whatsup man

this was a little different for you, it was pretty cool for the most part. def read smooth and u finally didn't incorporate obscure vocab and references, which made for a much more enjoyable read. overall the story was weird lol. Yehuda?? jewish guy or asian?

and LOL at the other names: Nate, Rob, Nigel and Ben Michael & Tim. so its a bunch of white Englishmen playing a game of pickup street basketball?? and then one maybe black guy Keyon , probly a fakeblack like cakes, a blackfakebrah. @ halfcake brah to thread to verify if these things actually happen. shit made me laugh. i wasn't expecting the ending either. assassin recruiting students, way outta left field. pretty original i guess. but i don't get why he needlessly just murdered all those poor innocent helpless ninny's first for no reason? haha

overall i thought the rhyming was good. the story was interesting and this was a good break from what u normally do so i liked it. i also found it pretty funny (maybe for different reasons) which i think was what u were kinda going for. it obviously wasn't supposed to be serious so yeah, was cool to see u do.

Sick · 03-30-2014, 06:53 AM

Cray

Objective · 03-30-2014, 05:22 PM

As others have mentioned this was abit different from what I've read from you before. The story was cool nevertheless. Didn't know what to expect and it kept me on the edge from start to finnish. Definitely liked the ending, kinda feeling an ''to be continued...'' after reading it through and I'd like a part 2 to see where Yehuda is headed in life and what he does with his training, haha. Dope shit Vulgar.

Vulgar · 04-02-2014, 12:37 PM

Thanks.

Certain · 04-02-2014, 12:43 PM

I didn't think this was that different for you. People only connect you with your abstract writing.

Vulgar · 04-02-2014, 12:50 PM

Thanks for the feedback in the league magazine, glad you liked it. I don't really write too many abstract pieces, but secretly I want every verse I write to be that way. It's easier to express my viewpoints and make my interpretations come across clearer, as unconventional as that sounds.

big baby · 04-02-2014, 01:23 PM

I liked all of it. It was easy to follow. Great

Exis · 04-03-2014, 01:57 AM

You have a remarkable way of tellin' a story, gettin' your point across and more importantly you seem to do it in a real effortless way.It's not easy to make lengthy lines flow yet you do it with ease on a consistent basis....it reads as a rhyme book with an incredible amount of wit included, it's very impressive and at times goes extremely unnoticed I feel...there's nothin' not to like here Vulgar.I would quote but I don't see the point, you know what's good and I like your joints as a whole anyways...good shit my friend.

Sorry for not feedin' this earlier, I tend to leave the best 'til last.

Stay upwards.

Vulgar · 04-07-2014, 12:35 PM

Thanks, last up.

Bodey · 04-09-2014, 02:37 AM

This was dope yo lmao holy shit. I liked the details all the way through. I was picturing every scene as I read on. I'm not used to seeing this style of writing from you but as usual, the content is still there. Definitely enjoyed it. Would like to see more narratives from you. The story was nuts, and almost chilling near the end. Good shit

e11even · 04-09-2014, 03:17 AM

Good shit Vulg. Been meaning to read this since you wrote it initially, but I kept pushing it off. I thought the bars were damn long, but you made the sum worth it, as this was choc - full - o - content. Cool piece full of awesome darkness and well - lent visuals. I'm pretty sure these names mentioned are actual names of b-ball legends, amirite? All in all, good job :)

03-29-2014, 10:49 AM	#1
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	"The Pick Up Basketball Game of Death" . Last edited by Vulgar; 12-06-2021 at 11:21 AM.

03-29-2014, 11:27 AM	#2
NYCSPITZ SYRACUSE Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,031 Battle Record: 31-37 Champed - Write Night II - Alias Topical Tournament Rep Power: 4743547	lmfaooooooo!!! __________________ UNIFIED THEORY

03-29-2014, 03:47 PM	#3
CopyPat Mic Check Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: Calgary Alberta Canada Posts: 708 Battle Record: 13-10 Rep Power: 3742225	haha whatsup man this was a little different for you, it was pretty cool for the most part. def read smooth and u finally didn't incorporate obscure vocab and references, which made for a much more enjoyable read. overall the story was weird lol. Yehuda?? jewish guy or asian? and LOL at the other names: Nate, Rob, Nigel and Ben Michael & Tim. so its a bunch of white Englishmen playing a game of pickup street basketball?? and then one maybe black guy Keyon , probly a fakeblack like cakes, a blackfakebrah. @ halfcake brah to thread to verify if these things actually happen. shit made me laugh. i wasn't expecting the ending either. assassin recruiting students, way outta left field. pretty original i guess. but i don't get why he needlessly just murdered all those poor innocent helpless ninny's first for no reason? haha overall i thought the rhyming was good. the story was interesting and this was a good break from what u normally do so i liked it. i also found it pretty funny (maybe for different reasons) which i think was what u were kinda going for. it obviously wasn't supposed to be serious so yeah, was cool to see u do. __________________ My syllable count approximately a billion, bounce. You cannot compete.

03-30-2014, 05:22 PM	#5
Objective ( ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º) Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 3,868 Battle Record: 17-32 Rep Power: 52474192	As others have mentioned this was abit different from what I've read from you before. The story was cool nevertheless. Didn't know what to expect and it kept me on the edge from start to finnish. Definitely liked the ending, kinda feeling an ''to be continued...'' after reading it through and I'd like a part 2 to see where Yehuda is headed in life and what he does with his training, haha. Dope shit Vulgar. __________________ I'm not a slave for entertainment, I'm entertainments personal slave, So deep into writing I'm concerned bout the text on my grave. www.youtube.com/watch?v=gV8ozGcGJ6o

04-09-2014, 03:17 AM	#13
e11even V.V Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: . Posts: 2,076 Battle Record: 31-20 Rep Power: 6247259	Good shit Vulg. Been meaning to read this since you wrote it initially, but I kept pushing it off. I thought the bars were damn long, but you made the sum worth it, as this was choc - full - o - content. Cool piece full of awesome darkness and well - lent visuals. I'm pretty sure these names mentioned are actual names of b-ball legends, amirite? All in all, good job :) __________________ Ahem.

03-30-2014, 06:53 AM	#4
Sick t00 0riginal 4 u Join Date: Jun 2013 Location: Just Write's mother's house Posts: 1,042 Battle Record: 7-1 Rep Power: 1837334	Cray

04-02-2014, 12:37 PM	#6
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	Thanks.

04-02-2014, 12:43 PM	#7
Certain Mad fucking dangerous. Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 12,066 Battle Record: 40-19 Champed - AOWL Season 3 - Art of Writing League (2x) Rep Power: 85899406	I didn't think this was that different for you. People only connect you with your abstract writing.

04-02-2014, 12:50 PM	#8
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	Thanks for the feedback in the league magazine, glad you liked it. I don't really write too many abstract pieces, but secretly I want every verse I write to be that way. It's easier to express my viewpoints and make my interpretations come across clearer, as unconventional as that sounds.

04-03-2014, 01:57 AM	#10
Exis ............ Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 3,934 Battle Record: 3-3 Rep Power: 0	You have a remarkable way of tellin' a story, gettin' your point across and more importantly you seem to do it in a real effortless way.It's not easy to make lengthy lines flow yet you do it with ease on a consistent basis....it reads as a rhyme book with an incredible amount of wit included, it's very impressive and at times goes extremely unnoticed I feel...there's nothin' not to like here Vulgar.I would quote but I don't see the point, you know what's good and I like your joints as a whole anyways...good shit my friend. Sorry for not feedin' this earlier, I tend to leave the best 'til last. Stay upwards.

04-07-2014, 12:35 PM	#11
Vulgar Razor-thin derision Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,422 Battle Record: 40-25 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night LIV - Gimmick Battle League (2x) - Write Week II - Art of Writing League - Storytelling And Topical Invitational Tournament - STI - Haiku Writer Challenge - GWL Picture Challenge(2x) Rep Power: 49604320	Thanks, last up.