Younger Generation

Flak · 04-16-2013, 06:14 PM

The kids need to be fed.
But dad wants a sleeve and a tree on his leg.
Sometimes I look at the youth and get sad as fuck
It seems like all they do is get knocked and tatted up.
Children get their fathers mouths, but not their daddy's bucks
Excuses like the economy sucks, lookin for a job but haven't had any luck
That's what they say, What place do they look?
I guess it's hard to find work sitting all day on facebook.
Decorating their bodies instead of their houses
Neglecting their seeds, disconnecting from spouses
Momma's main goal is to look good, you know it's twisted
Home already broken before a home existed
Little ones raised by a T.V. that caters to the sick desires of the parents
If you're not doing anything wrong, then why are you embarassed?
They got the nerve to blame the teachers when the babes get in trouble
Bouncing off the walls, got their behavior on shuffle
No order at all, complete lack of discipline
Every time they act out, just feed em some Ritalin
They growing up so fast, these young couples need help
If you think I'm far-fetched, you can see for yourself
Don't take my word for it, I'm just playing the messenger
Like paperboy, so let's make our boys and girls our investiture
The apple don't fall far from the tree, or so they say
Perhaps they'll take care of us when we're old and grey
-------

Zen · 04-17-2013, 10:27 AM

I read this in an old man voice and pictured you writing this while sitting in a recliner with slacks pulled up to your chest as Matlock plays on TV.
But anywho as far as the piece is concerned...I didn't enjoy it. The rhyme scheme was much too simple for my taste and the lines were very stretched which in turn fucked up the flow. I'd suggest practicing in some cyphers and viewing other pieces around the OM. Keep droppin man.

Flak · 04-17-2013, 09:27 PM

Thanks for imagining me doing stuff.

04-16-2013, 06:14 PM	#1
Flak Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Posts: 6 Rep Power: 37	Younger Generation The kids need to be fed. But dad wants a sleeve and a tree on his leg. Sometimes I look at the youth and get sad as fuck It seems like all they do is get knocked and tatted up. Children get their fathers mouths, but not their daddy's bucks Excuses like the economy sucks, lookin for a job but haven't had any luck That's what they say, What place do they look? I guess it's hard to find work sitting all day on facebook. Decorating their bodies instead of their houses Neglecting their seeds, disconnecting from spouses Momma's main goal is to look good, you know it's twisted Home already broken before a home existed Little ones raised by a T.V. that caters to the sick desires of the parents If you're not doing anything wrong, then why are you embarassed? They got the nerve to blame the teachers when the babes get in trouble Bouncing off the walls, got their behavior on shuffle No order at all, complete lack of discipline Every time they act out, just feed em some Ritalin They growing up so fast, these young couples need help If you think I'm far-fetched, you can see for yourself Don't take my word for it, I'm just playing the messenger Like paperboy, so let's make our boys and girls our investiture The apple don't fall far from the tree, or so they say Perhaps they'll take care of us when we're old and grey -------

04-17-2013, 10:27 AM	#2
Zen Arm the Homeless Join Date: Jan 2013 Posts: 4,102 Battle Record: 22-24 Champed - Art of Writing League Rep Power: 35079722	I read this in an old man voice and pictured you writing this while sitting in a recliner with slacks pulled up to your chest as Matlock plays on TV. But anywho as far as the piece is concerned...I didn't enjoy it. The rhyme scheme was much too simple for my taste and the lines were very stretched which in turn fucked up the flow. I'd suggest practicing in some cyphers and viewing other pieces around the OM. Keep droppin man.

04-17-2013, 09:27 PM	#3
Flak Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2013 Posts: 6 Rep Power: 37	Thanks for imagining me doing stuff.