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#1 |
Arm the Homeless
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 4,102
Battle Record: 22-24
Champed - Art of Writing League
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Hey, there. It’s been awhile. Does it matter that I’ve missed you? Even though we scattered, I never fathomed to forget you. We’re such a mismatch. In fact, I’m maddest when I’m with you, but that doesn’t change the happiness we imagined that we lived through. You see, love turned to madness. We became addicts. I was smoking your breath – ‘till we turned to ashes taking tokes to our death. Then there came the crash. We’re emotional wrecks. Quick, step on the gas as we coast in the ditch.
We walk along the sidewalk, keeping our space. Reminiscing on the past, that dream with a face. Her’s, mine, close. Sleeping for days. Seeing with eyes closed a peace we escaped. What could it hurt? One more ride. Hey, I believe we were made to cut ties so we could see what it takes. In time we’ll be just fine, and I think it’ll be a piece of cake. Here, cut you a slice. Eat and be ate. Last edited by Zen; 02-14-2015 at 11:41 PM. |
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#2 |
nok Su kow
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 4,505
Battle Record: 1-1
Rep Power: 51788022 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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Smooth as some velvet cake. Poetic and genuine.
The words were vibrant, flourecent & heavenly! Must be the specialest angel to inspire such grace Got yours sweets & flowers...Mine: barbed wire & duct tape Fa'real tho, nice gooey shtuff mang! We musith collabith soonith..
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"black as midnight..black as pitch blacker than the soul of the foulest witch" |
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#3 |
Ad mini tator
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 10,025
Battle Record: 26-54
Champed - Lime Green Poetry Association
- Black August
- 1-2 Punch League
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we became addicts. I smoking your breath till we turned into ashes.
that was, some outstanding imagery my friend. the smoothness of each word next each other is just flawless. this was dope. I love that you structure your pieces the wsy you do makes them feel unique and original at least to me anyway. this one had great creative imagery in background of your story. and tbh your style is very zen lol. each read no matter the plot reads like butter milk pancakes yo. dope piece man. |
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#4 |
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 1,632
Battle Record: 3-5
Champed - Haiku Writers Challenge
Rep Power: 85899380 ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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this was great.
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