a second thought

[YDK]

What happened between us is overrated, a smile with dimples and such,
Turning complicated communication into something as simple as "fuck".
A one night stand every night with the same person; it's lust,
Melodramatic pillow talk only worsen with luck.
I love you becomes an artsy way of saying I don't want you to leave,
But when you do I'll believe that you didn't want me to see.
The door closing quietly brings a sigh of relief,
Because at least I'm not the one walking away from the scene.
Hearts collide; the collision explodes
Erupting into something from the visions of old.
Hide and seek, touch the base and your safe for the night,
Where the nightmares only prey if you stray from the light.
Too often I've thought of different ways I could fight,
My tormented thoughts that attack my soul out of sight.
Out of body out of mind, searching for significant signs
A shot for me a shot for you, we'll down the bottle with time.
When I'm sober I'll leave clues as to my being rejected,
And you'll understand my nature, a recluse that's protected.
Ironic perfection, I'm at my best when I'm bad,
Seeing my reflection in a coke mirror reminds me of dad.
Its time to leave, I stand up too unstable to walk,
I stand there swaying back and forth and grip the table to talk.
I'm not the brightest person in the room but I desperately plead
For a shoulder to cry on; let my destiny bleed.
Through the pores on my face, the emotions erupt
I taste the salt of my tears from the opening ducts.
I just hope its enough,
Light a cigarette inhale the smoke with a puff
And realize my whole life I've been too focused on "tough".