Things White mothers say about their newborn babies

[Badweather]

when two or more brand new (white) mothers meet up at coffee pubs, sit outside with their babies in the strollers, cross their legs and brag about the stupid shit their babies can do.

"Yeah well, Teegan starting rolling onto her stomach 3 days ago. I thought they weren't supposed to be able to do that until around 2 or 3 months. Hmm, huh, I guess she's ahead of her time and better than every other baby ever born."


"Oh, Skylar sat up on his own and made eye contact with me this morning. He's so focused, so intense. It's like he's been here before already."


"I got a video on my phone you guys need to watch and be jealous of. This is a video of Abby Meredith 'talking.' I swear she's gonna be a lawyer just like her father!"




blah blah blah

Go ride your baby's nuts in private.