LARS & COPYPAT - "WHITE BOY WASTED"

[Baron Mynd]

“It’s the Morgan’s Spiced connoisseurs, let us in quick!”
…we sorta might of just slurred ,while smelling of piff.
We fall inside with a burp and head for a drink
almost caused a fight with some nerd when I said to his chick:
“I bet you suck dick,” with a wink and a nod
he acts ready to flip and it’s pissing me off
so I clench up my fists - once I hit him, he drops,
Pat’s caught what’s left of my drink without spilling a drop!
…The bitch had just gone without saying good bye,
must have dipped from the spot while I weighed in her guy.
But I think with my cock, so I’m straight on my grind,
for a different body to lay with tonight.
So I’m blatantly eyeing this catch of the month
and taking my time, my glass is untouched,
Some lame comes behind me & happens to shove
- Security’s made up their mind there’s no hats in the club!
Pat saw them comin’ so then in a flash
he’s landed a punch on this member of staff.
I staggered in drunk, don’t remember the facts
but I’d bagged me that honey
& kept the bar fight record intact…



I drink honey brown lager cause I’m classy as fuck.
I’m cunning, mad proper when I crash in ya dump.
I run around talkin cause I’m hammin it up,
till my stomach growls stop it then I dash for some grub.

I walk through the Wendy’s drive-through steppin.
And talk to this testy guy who’s tendin’.
I pause at the menu. Fries? You betcha.
But this small pimply head dude decides I’m too aggressive.

Refusal of service cause I’m thoroughly sloshed.
Excuse me, I burp because of earlier shots.
Confused at this jerk, determined, I’m not
refusing to turn until this burger is bought.

So it’s a Mexican standoff till he finally he breaks.
And let’s me in, “Damn brah” I chidingly say.
I guess he was mad cause when I try to just pay,
I get arrested & handcuffed, and guided away.

The bastard’s a joke all horny for procedure.
Harassment I’m told from Tony the policeman.
I asked for my phone call, to sort out my Visa.
But that’s when I hoaxed cops and ordered a pizza.

“…quit calling me Lisa! It’s Lars, man, wassup?
We swarmed on that geezer at the bar then you cut.
I brought back the skeezer, parked up then run,
Talk up, I’ll meet ya… where are you– you WHAT!?”


@CopyPat