Cereal -
I've decided to read your pieces by imagining some dude on a stage, half spoken word style, half rant. it feels like a piece about a drug dealer who built a small empire, who knows at the end of the day, despite the money coming in, they're just a small fish that's gotten a bit too big for its pond and every day the sharks come closer.
Quote:
|
a little christian born atheist glue sniffer school skipper
|
Quote:
i go from gangster art to ganster in the blink of an eye
...
but i keep the people that built my castle alive
|
best lines. it was decently tied to the topic, just hard to read unless the reader figures out a style that fits.
Civil -
I know last week I said "gosh guys give some feedback that is useful" but this is a fucking struggle. your writing style lives up to your name and there was no connection to the topic. I think the imagery of going to church and thinking of spiders could have been a really cool central theme if handled, but boy was this not handled — no dope lines.
vote: Cereal, the lesser of two evils