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dull boy · 03-03-2021, 07:40 PM

WEEK 5 MATCH UPS AND PREDICTIONS
(by UserName)

Blue V User

I'm a little burnt out this morning and User wasn't keen on previewing his own battle. So I apologize to User and Blue, but I'm going to just quote Des on this one.

Prediction - one of them will write better than the other one. then the other one will win likely.

Dave V Frac

Dave’s been redcoating his way through this league ever since he took an Ambien and lost to Sharp in week 1. He seems to have really found his footing as of late, utilizing the league’s unique style to land some perfectly executed rebuttals. It makes you wonder just how much they make fun of each other over there in Narnia. But then there’s Fracture. The guy who makes clever look easy, coming off an unfortunate DQ loss to Blue, but this may have sharpened him up and made him ready for a bit of the old ultra-violence. See what I did there? Great movie. Anyways, this should be another classic, and it doesn’t seem like Dull’s giving Frac any weeks off, even after a loss. I expect Frac to come with it and Dave to be like “ARE YOU TAKING THE PISS, LUV?”

Prediction – Dave signs out after this week because I’m running out of British jokes.

Seth V Hush

The Lethal Lisp vs. Teeth & Tits. Haha, I made a multi out of it. Sorry. Seth finally got on track last week and disco’d his way out of his losing slump by flogging Inf rather convincingly. Meanwhile, Hush took a squatting Dominican street-style shit into Lars’ waiting mouth in possibly the longest and most epic battle of the league so far. These guys are both riding high’s right now and it’s kinda great they get to square off against each other. I’m expecting another lengthy showdown, as both of these guys really seem to enjoy this style of battling.

Prediction – There will be nothing but peace and happiness between these two because they absolutely adore each other.[/s]

Des V Adverse

Lowkey BOTW contender if these guys take it seriously. Yes, I know both guys are coming off a loss but both of them are absolutely highlights of the league so far. Des is relentless when he finds an angle he loves and there’s honestly plenty of angles to take against Adverse. But the same can be said of Des. Honestly, I haven’t wanted to see a phone salesman and a janitor go head-to-head more ever in my life. I’m expecting Des to jump out early with a lead and Ad steadily climbing his way back into this battle around response 4 or so. It may take a minute for this battle to heat up, but when it does, this should be another one of the more entertaining matches this week.

Prediction – Ad will listen to Fort Minor at some point this week. Ugh, disgusting.

Lars V Kill Spree

Lars is coming off of his marathon battle with Hush and Spree has been signed out since his week one loss to Coop. This was a late addition to the card so User didn't get a chance to preview this one. I'm adding it here for posterity.

Prediction - dijasidjasijdaisjdiasjdqiwdqw

Fraze V Defiant

I think both would agree this battle is kinda the undercard of the week, being that both are still getting acclimated to the league and I don’t think either has dropped more than 3 times in a battle yet. Hopefully one of these two sparks the other’s creative drive and this battle can become something special. Because I mean, otherwise, I have Fraze showing up once and Defiant possibly noshowing. I’m sorry I can’t be overly positive about this with Defiant’s track record.

Prediction – Now, because I’ve talked shit, this battle will be the Ali vs. Frazier of the week and be the most epic thing Netcee’s has ever fucking seen.

Mac V bleak

I’ve given Mac a lot of time. I’ve heaped praise upon him because it’s evident he has the little spark of a legendary text battler. I’ve seen the concepts, I’ve SEEN THEM. The creativity exists in there, I know it does. He just hasn’t let it out in about a year and seems to only be trying to slowly suffocate it with a pillow every chance he gets. But god damn it he’s beautiful. Idk, I’m torn. Will he unleash the mythical beast this week or continue to write Eddie Guerrero fan fiction? You’re tearing me apart, Mac. Oh yeah, bleak’s here too. Go get him bleak.

Prediction – I don’t know anymore. This hurts to even type…but I think bleak wins.

Rules

I'm always open to answering questions, but please refer to this first if you're unsure of something.

Excessive chatter used as a lead in to your bars will not be tolerated and
could result in a DQ at my discretion. Let your bars do the talking.

1. Opener

Each battle will begin with a coin chosen participant to open the battle. I will @ you when threads are posted each week
informing you that you're on the clock. Your post is the only bar(s) of the battle that don't need to directly or indirectly
reference a previous bar. Some may say it's a disadvantage to open, but the counter to that argument is that it's the only
opportunity to use a generic punch during the battle.

Each post has a 1 bar minimum, 2 bar max. You will have 24 hours from the time the thread is posted to submit your bar(s).
Failing to post within that time limit will result in a DQ and a loss on your record.

2. Rebuttal

Once the opener has been posted you will have 24 hours from the time it was posted to submit your bar(s).
If you fail to respond within that 24 hours it will result in a DQ and a loss on your record. Again, it is a 1 bar minimum and a 2 bar max.
YOU DO NOT HAVE TO MATCH THE AMOUNT YOUR OPPONENT POSTED. Any line after the opening bar(s) must reference a previously posted bar(s) from the battle, be that directly or indirectly.

There is no restriction to how long you must wait to reply once your opponent has posted.
There is no limit to how many times you and your opponent can exchange bars. Battles will end every Sunday at midnight EST.

If you opened the battle you may not post after 10:59PM EST.
This is to discourage last second posting without giving your opponent
the opporunity to respond and equal the number of posts in a battle.

3. Judging and voting

Threads will be closed Sunday at midnight EST. A panel of 5 anonymous judges will send their votes directly to me and the winners will be announced Wednesday in the mag.

03-03-2021, 07:40 PM	#2
dull boy consults Lloyd Join Date: Aug 2013 Posts: 4,075 Battle Record: 0-8 Champed -1-2 Punch League Roast Rep Power: 39345600	WEEK 5 MATCH UPS AND PREDICTIONS (by UserName) Blue V User I'm a little burnt out this morning and User wasn't keen on previewing his own battle. So I apologize to User and Blue, but I'm going to just quote Des on this one. Prediction - one of them will write better than the other one. then the other one will win likely. Dave V Frac Dave’s been redcoating his way through this league ever since he took an Ambien and lost to Sharp in week 1. He seems to have really found his footing as of late, utilizing the league’s unique style to land some perfectly executed rebuttals. It makes you wonder just how much they make fun of each other over there in Narnia. But then there’s Fracture. The guy who makes clever look easy, coming off an unfortunate DQ loss to Blue, but this may have sharpened him up and made him ready for a bit of the old ultra-violence. See what I did there? Great movie. Anyways, this should be another classic, and it doesn’t seem like Dull’s giving Frac any weeks off, even after a loss. I expect Frac to come with it and Dave to be like “ARE YOU TAKING THE PISS, LUV?” Prediction – Dave signs out after this week because I’m running out of British jokes. Seth V Hush The Lethal Lisp vs. Teeth & Tits. Haha, I made a multi out of it. Sorry. Seth finally got on track last week and disco’d his way out of his losing slump by flogging Inf rather convincingly. Meanwhile, Hush took a squatting Dominican street-style shit into Lars’ waiting mouth in possibly the longest and most epic battle of the league so far. These guys are both riding high’s right now and it’s kinda great they get to square off against each other. I’m expecting another lengthy showdown, as both of these guys really seem to enjoy this style of battling. Prediction – There will be nothing but peace and happiness between these two because they absolutely adore each other.[/s] Des V Adverse Lowkey BOTW contender if these guys take it seriously. Yes, I know both guys are coming off a loss but both of them are absolutely highlights of the league so far. Des is relentless when he finds an angle he loves and there’s honestly plenty of angles to take against Adverse. But the same can be said of Des. Honestly, I haven’t wanted to see a phone salesman and a janitor go head-to-head more ever in my life. I’m expecting Des to jump out early with a lead and Ad steadily climbing his way back into this battle around response 4 or so. It may take a minute for this battle to heat up, but when it does, this should be another one of the more entertaining matches this week. Prediction – Ad will listen to Fort Minor at some point this week. Ugh, disgusting. Lars V Kill Spree Lars is coming off of his marathon battle with Hush and Spree has been signed out since his week one loss to Coop. This was a late addition to the card so User didn't get a chance to preview this one. I'm adding it here for posterity. Prediction - dijasidjasijdaisjdiasjdqiwdqw Fraze V Defiant I think both would agree this battle is kinda the undercard of the week, being that both are still getting acclimated to the league and I don’t think either has dropped more than 3 times in a battle yet. Hopefully one of these two sparks the other’s creative drive and this battle can become something special. Because I mean, otherwise, I have Fraze showing up once and Defiant possibly noshowing. I’m sorry I can’t be overly positive about this with Defiant’s track record. Prediction – Now, because I’ve talked shit, this battle will be the Ali vs. Frazier of the week and be the most epic thing Netcee’s has ever fucking seen. Mac V bleak I’ve given Mac a lot of time. I’ve heaped praise upon him because it’s evident he has the little spark of a legendary text battler. I’ve seen the concepts, I’ve SEEN THEM. The creativity exists in there, I know it does. He just hasn’t let it out in about a year and seems to only be trying to slowly suffocate it with a pillow every chance he gets. But god damn it he’s beautiful. Idk, I’m torn. Will he unleash the mythical beast this week or continue to write Eddie Guerrero fan fiction? You’re tearing me apart, Mac. Oh yeah, bleak’s here too. Go get him bleak. Prediction – I don’t know anymore. This hurts to even type…but I think bleak wins. Rules I'm always open to answering questions, but please refer to this first if you're unsure of something. Excessive chatter used as a lead in to your bars will not be tolerated and could result in a DQ at my discretion. Let your bars do the talking. 1. Opener Each battle will begin with a coin chosen participant to open the battle. I will @ you when threads are posted each week informing you that you're on the clock. Your post is the only bar(s) of the battle that don't need to directly or indirectly reference a previous bar. Some may say it's a disadvantage to open, but the counter to that argument is that it's the only opportunity to use a generic punch during the battle. Each post has a 1 bar minimum, 2 bar max. You will have 24 hours from the time the thread is posted to submit your bar(s). Failing to post within that time limit will result in a DQ and a loss on your record. 2. Rebuttal Once the opener has been posted you will have 24 hours from the time it was posted to submit your bar(s). If you fail to respond within that 24 hours it will result in a DQ and a loss on your record. Again, it is a 1 bar minimum and a 2 bar max. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO MATCH THE AMOUNT YOUR OPPONENT POSTED. Any line after the opening bar(s) must reference a previously posted bar(s) from the battle, be that directly or indirectly. There is no restriction to how long you must wait to reply once your opponent has posted. There is no limit to how many times you and your opponent can exchange bars. Battles will end every Sunday at midnight EST. If you opened the battle you may not post after 10:59PM EST. This is to discourage last second posting without giving your opponent the opporunity to respond and equal the number of posts in a battle. 3. Judging and voting Threads will be closed Sunday at midnight EST. A panel of 5 anonymous judges will send their votes directly to me and the winners will be announced Wednesday in the mag. Last edited by dull boy; 03-04-2021 at 12:59 PM.