[PancakeBrah]

"for something to change. choke confessionals while swallowing razors"

The exact moment you went from homage to poor parody. Although the next line has the slickest line of the verse. Let me highlight it, because it is slick as hell.

"honest to Abel, this is hardly novel behavior"

That's a good line, no matter the context.

"mighty morphin powerless ranger"

What are we doing here?

"infecting everything that i touch
Black jacket fentanyl tucked for when we're ready to fuck"

Awful.

"Left the chevy in neutral we're downhill leveling up"

Leveling up is not something to say there.

"our metronome arrhythmia unsteady it pumps"

Good.

"convoluted, often music leads me to cry
my favorite songs are reinforcing all my reasons to die"

Way too direct and honest for what you're going for. Can be good, is just bad here. Crawling close to awful. Something I'd write, uber-drunk, with better context.

"chameleon prime regurgitating sequencing rhyme"

Absolute nonsense.

"blending iron opacity with steely resign
see me shining brightly from 11 to 9
after midnight i'm a blackbird on electrical lines"

Liked all of this. Middle line was weak, but connected two good lines.

"take a talon off and let the current inside
it only hurts a moment. then we fly."

Unsure if this is good or really awful.

Try writing for yourself. Write about pretending to be a millionaire. This wasn't the worst attempt, or as bad the previous criticism would suggest. You have some talent for evocative phrasing and rhyming, trying to ape our best writer just isn't where your talents align.