Thread: The King
View Single Post
Old 07-30-2019, 12:16 AM   #6
Objective
( ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º)
 
Objective's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,783
Battle Record: 17-32



Rep Power: 52474188
Objective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant futureObjective has a brilliant future
Default

It reads like a poem in a playful way to me. You got AAABAAAB-set ups that makes its impact in terms of the latter in a interesting way. Your use of metaphors and similies sometimes goes overboard for me as it's hard to grasp what's really going on at times. After a couple reads I'm starting to see the pattern a bit clearer tho and it grows on me as a poetry-piece. I understand it all as you trying to visualize the burden of the crown and the motions of it all, and what he gotta go through in an abstract way which is dope, but I don't really get where you're bringing it towards the end. Who does who meet when who grows up?

Overall I enjoyed the read despite the fact that it could get a little bit confusing at times but interesting and dope in its own way nonetheless. Keep writing/dropping!
__________________
I'm not a slave for entertainment, I'm entertainments personal slave,
So deep into writing I'm concerned bout the text on my grave.


www.youtube.com/watch?v=gV8ozGcGJ6o
Objective is offline   Reply With Quote