There's a river where my mother was murdered and left for dead -
where the fish nibbled her body 'til the blood wasn't as red...
brown stains on the rocks, too exhausted to run again...
I was just hiding inside a log that was up and around the bend.
men surrounded her carcass...one yelled to the other, "FIND HIM!"
I could see it was me they wanted; dogs barked as he jogged behind 'em.
heart pulsing, stomach was climbin'...pleasant day - but I was tired...
emotionally distraught; my mama's gone and I was cryin'...
we were just mindin' our own, walkin' the rocks we always did
papa had gone to hunt... me and mom took the day to fish..
Thunder crash...no muzzle flash, I must've been lookin' away from them,
I couldn't see where it came from, mom stepped until her face was in -
directly touching the riverbed...nose inside of the pebbles,
red swirls inside my reflection when I tried to bend to her level
I was growling with pain and misery, more thunder; the rocks went skittering
I wanted to fight for her, but flight was all that was gripping me..
running was breaking free, and I found that hollowed out stump...
I jumped inside, I was just hiding...and I could smell the aroma of skunk
men were rifling through the trees, their rifles cradled in a hug,
I heard an angry one say the words, "They go for $8,000 a cub..."
Mama laid there bleeding, my heart screaming, papa is gone...
remembering the hole I saw in her head, how the look of her steps was wrong
I'd never forget the fall on a summer day... it felt nightmarishly long
the skunk ran in the open and everything went slow motion - anxiety for the dogs.
because they tracked me to that rodent...but then they made it spray...
as the men shouted at their hounds...their hands waved in dismay.
I laid there for days...
When I finally left my post? It wasn't much of her left...
The men had left her to rot - the vultures got at her best.
I didn't get to say bye...and those men don't think I care,
they just wanted me for their circus...I woulda hated it there
I simply sat and I stared - her splattered brain on the rocks,
I just wanted so bad to walk away with my mom...
summer sun on my fur... salmon caught in my jaw...
now I'm going down river all alone as I walk,
scared of everything, skittish, from the hope that I've lost.
dreams of kisses, sleepy cuddles, things a mama bear does,
but they made a boy a man when they got me to run.
|