[Lindel]

Panacea



1. Emily


one night I wander waywardly. Aimlessly along the rayless streets
past granite shanties, befogged by rain and sleet, not one warm nook to lay and sleep
then I find you. A curly little caterpillar, who'd crawled beneath the trestle
sleepy, nestled in the dying Whitlow and Shepherd's-Purse that streaks the pebbles
pipe still hot and redolent - your ring-less fingers scorched a coffee-hue
hair as black as fossil-fuel, a dog-eared shower curtain shrugged on top of you
the sign above the bar blinks apple-neon, one broke bulb is a crypt for the flies
you've pissed on your thighs, head cranked back and tilted, like you're kissing the sky
you're beautiful. Below the methane emissions that hang like a rainbow
i lay my head on this magnanimous angel, fall fast asleep in her halogen halo
she wakes. Her crystal eyes, they fall on me like breaking waves on sand
and when i kneel to present the rock, she doesn't hesitate to take my hand

~

2. Tomorrow

dear Emily,

you left, i descended. Every time i close my eyes, i see the eels
bloated, black aliens ... wheezing with disease, more than even the streets can yield
their sweltry hide's like boiled kale, moist and pale - they're eating me
nowadays you're keeping clean, but I had no such grace bequeathed to me
i shan't lie. The sidewalk would be softer, if i had your hand to hold
had you not gone back to home, this concrete - would not be, quite so damp and cold
don't you remember? How we set into motion no fettering notion of honour or pride?
slinging rock on the side? - we were Ben Sanderson and Sera, we were Bonnie and Clyde
regardless, i still chalk my poems on the boulevard ... maybe you read them
it's like you always said, they make that little square of pavement an Eden
don't worry, i won't post this letter, it would only be fueling my sorrow
please love me. please love me.

yours truly,

Tomorrow

~

3. Panacea

now you'll see me. You fucking robot, your garden is so sickly green
home so crisp and clean, ph-neutral soap, pro-plus, propane pumps and Listerine
crow bar up beneath the lintel - easy, simple, tears and splinters blend with the rain
it bends with the strain, the oak cracks, I hesitate - then remember the pain
the guardian comes - a shabby old Terrier, hardly a vessel of speed and strength
she's in less than decent health. But our eyes align and for a moment, i see myself
an LP hiccups under a needle, from buzzard to beetle, creatures preserved for exhibition
it's thin and brief; some inner peace - but there's no extradition from this mental prison
i creep up the stairs, my whitened knuckles lightly brushing the balustrade
i am afraid. But Emily, you said to me - you promised you'd never take your hand away
wherever you go the pain will follow
i'm just a bad dream, of course. But at least you've faced Tomorrow.

Are You Not Brave / Writing exercise / L.N.

~

Last night I had a crazy dream, not even half of it good though
I must preface by saying, I'm in love - don't worry, this is far from a Love Note
Lola Nash is her name, but back to the dream, a land of lakes and twisting brooks
An orphic place of Luring Numinous, from Lea's Neverending, to Labyrinthine Nooks
I was in the tavern, diffidently sipping mead from a faux-golden cup
Languishing Noticeably, when I was suddenly approached by the Local Nut
There this ogre stood with his oafish mug - gawking at me, saying squat
Then - a tremendous belch, I Laughed Noisily, coughed and gave him a Lazy Nod
He sat besides me ... "Listen Neighbor, might you part with any extra fairy-dust"?
This made me a Little Nervous, but the portly fellow couldn't be Less Nefarious
I untwisted a Lachrymiform Napkin, and gave him a pinch of effervescent matter
"Bless you Squire ... you ever heard of Lord Niflheim, the Legendary Necromancer?"
Tiring of this Leper's Natter, I was sure i'd run him through in a moment
Be it King, or Queen or Lonely Nomad, I don't have time for Ludicrous Notions
But when he produced a curious amulet, i felt compelled to let him finish
"Take a look" - so i did, 4 Lions, Necks stretched inside a Luminescent Nimbus
"Niflheim gave me this blessed trinket, alas, it can only be used by the brave"
"Hold it in a Butter-Cap Mushroom Patch, kneel, and speak Lucifers Name"
I asked, "but what will happen?" - then his jolly smile turned to blackest scorn
Glaring past that Long Nose, that boil-ridden snot-encrusted, Lurching Naricorn
"Are you not brave?" His voice was deep and smooth, it hit me like a sedative
"You should Leave Now" - he seemed less a friendly drunk, more a Lifelong Nemesis
"Oh I am, I'm going to the Butter-Cap Mushroom Patch, would Mister like to come?"
Suddenly the room was icy, misty, as though we were swimming in Liquid Nitrogen
But I could feel the panic rising, that caustic anxiety strumming my throat
"It's alright Squire, follow me" - again, his voice as soft as a Lullabye's Note
I did, it was hard to keep up; an odd sight this plump chap skipping swiftly
Through a forest thick and windy, till there they were, 50 mushrooms Lilting Nimbly
The air was bitter, filmy, I couldn't decide if it was scanty or venomous
I forced a breath anyway, then picked a mushroom from its Lacteous Nebula
It was like a Lingering Nightmare, like viewing the world through smokey glass
I said, "Let's Not do this" ... "But Squire, are you not in love with Lola Nash?"
My heart, it froze, collapsed, I'd so-far helmed my sanity: he capsized the vessel
I felt Limp, Naked, looked at my palm, no mushroom, instead the amulet Lightly Nestled
"Look No further than this - are you not brave? Then you must make the darkest vow"
"In Lucifers Name" - imbued with a shame so wretched, my stomach felt like Lava Now
I knelt, perhaps out of love, perhaps I just wanted this Hell to be finished
Oh ... who am i kidding? I spoke Lucifers Name because I'm a Lecherous Nitwit
Thunder and lightning, the violent roar of the forest ensued, I was helpless
Then i was whisked away through some refulgent conduit, some Luminous Nexus
I awoke abruptly, flustered, I hurdled over my duvet feeling desperate, awful
Later, Nontheless, after a few soporific classes, my day was Lenitive, Normal
But the dream was vivid still, i couldn't wait to get my love alone at last
After the bell rung, I Loitered Nervously, and then I saw her: Lola Nash
I said, with impeccable eloquence, "Sup bitch, how bout we get our freak on"
Her reply was simple but poignant, I think you'll agree: she said, "dream on"

The Train Station.

midnight iron, snaking out like specters fingers, then melting in the mist
i would like to think their odyssey is over, and that they welcome the abyss
as tender as a kiss, these shingles and their watermarks - they speak to me
almost secretly ... a hundred years gone, a hundred years of grief to be
and what unsung tales have these puffs of brisk-departing smoke imbibed?
what many stories could be told and why - do open eyes behold them - blind?
those ochre tiles, tanned to character-perfection, by nervous cigarettes
scratches, dirt and hints of sweat; the signatures of phantoms, in swirls and pirouettes.
a beggars nose gulps coffee steam - snobbily, from her sumptuous throne of trash
no gumption's prone to last, but no one thought to tell Her Majesty; she couldn't stoke the ash
i guess it's a macabre song, this with such a gulfing jaw, that challenges one
to turn one's back on the Sun ... then chase the wheels of a pram as it tractors along
or amass with the throng - no better coat than the Rorschach smudge of busy strangers
no distance greater; backwards, forward, backwards, forward; forward with the width of vapor
i watch the tired carriages, shrugging along their shouldered clouds of people
eighty tons of frozen faces, homeless-nameless ... and I can't see one ounce of evil
i think, maybe, they're just like me ... you know? - trying to unravel truth
about life, about death - but ... what the Hell do I know ...? I'm merely passing through