[Dominate]

Ya whole personality is giving it up, lil welfare sleazy hoe
Slut’s taken more Shots to the Back lately than that healthcare CEO
Cool. Simple flip but it’s a recent event and it’s executed well.
It works.
You just know that shit is stank, like a moldy green cheddar scent
Seen this bitch open her legs & been repulsed by grilled cheese ever since
lol. Okay.
Loud and ugly, no amount of makeup could hide the shame
Ain’t talkin jacking styles when I say no one tryna ride ya Wave
alright name flip. Getting a little bit redundant conceptually punch wise
You should be taken out, of this world, not some horny datin’ shit
Rail u then toss you Underground, that’s word to your shorty Harriet
Rhyme was a little off to me. Minor distraction from what was otherwise a pretty good bar. The topical folks might not be familiar with “rail” as a term for “shoot”. Good attack bar.

Them voters musta been drunk, how u champ a league, some luck dude
Cuz u ain’t Bomb Bae - it just takes gallons of that gin to wanna fuck you
Prob your cleanest wordplay and strongest bar. Good stuff


Ether - I’m not sure it makes sense to do a line by line breakdown for your verse since yours wasn’t structured into that same set up/punchline format. I think your instincts are good here - you’ve nailed the “tone” you want to hit in a battle verse which is something I’ve seen most topical writers struggle with when trying to cross over to battles. I liked “put So many holes in this boy til he see through.” And “He a pig. I’m starting the roast” was also a decent wordplay. Some other lines were a bit too generic or focused on self hype. You’ve been bested here but I thank you for giving this a go and hope you’ll try again in the next one.

V/ John