take a pull off the sour diesel, i chop it up wit my dawg
we talkin crazy n stupid bout droppin out to spit bars
been spendin hours n days just cookin beats in my room
recordin verses n smokin cuz what else is there to do
when you 17 wit a vision n desperate for somethin new
thought we'd have this shit on lock by the time i turned 22
but now in 22 days, another dream finna die
at least i know that if i fail again my team finna ride
man im lucky that my brothers never leave from my side
they just lean in when i need em or a piece of advice
i got no peace on my mind, but shit at least i still try
demons reachin, evil feeds off me one piece at a time
my people leachin, its fine... thats why i let my phone die
dont try n call cuz thats an auto decline...
so many losses, no wonder where all my sickness derives
all this talk of winnin make me think that shit is a lie
so very tired, tryna catch up on the sleep im deprived
feelin weak in the knees, wheeze when i breathe all the time
can i even survive livin like this til 35
cuz half of the time, i dont even feel like im alive
just seperated n distant, sittin next to myself
tryna scream in my own ear to get up n get sum help
but im just stubborn n stuck in these habits i form myself
mama said that i gotta change for the better n for my health
i never saw myself here, when i looked ahead bout 5 years
in my homies room as a child rappin behind tears
thought i would be special but now im just older it seems
said me n him was gon change the game, now we dont even speak
ill just grow old n be bleak til i die sometime in the night
cuz my family said i wasnt meant for this...
and now im realizing they right.
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