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Old 01-08-2023, 03:26 AM   #6
Adverse
low tide in serotonin bay
 
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,752
Battle Record: 37-28


Champed
- GWL Picture Challenge
- Guerrilla Writing League
- Black August II

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Rock - thought this had some pretty good pieces here and there but when it came to them coming together and making a bigger picture you left a lot to be desired. The ending was sort of unresolved and I would have liked to see it be more concrete, and some of the writing was super minuscule, but this was sort of engaging despite the aimless wondering of both the penmanship and your Character.

PA - I liked that you tried an original take though I’m not sure what it amounted to, it was all over the place at times it felt like there was going to be a storyline, then it was meta, then it just bounced all over the place so I didn’t dig it. Like I said the intention was good but the product left a lot to be desired.

Master Rock had the more complete piece. “Complete” is a word to be taken with a mountain of salt because neither verses were very complete, they both left a lot to be desired. But as far as just linear storytelling and being engaging I’ll take Rock

V/ROCK
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