Okay I’m not a huge fan of either verse but I appreciate both of you guys as writers.
Sym- I think there was some real nice imagery stuff here, really liked the way you described the storm and what not. Liked how you gave us an up close perspective of everything and the flow was okay if not iffy. I really didn’t like the ending though, feel like it could have been made more impactful with better wording and maybe fleshed out a tad bit more. It just seemed abrupt and there was never really any a-ha! Type moment, it ended without any theatrics Which was sort of a bummer. Overall, decent Verse but I’ve seen better from you
PA - I feel like I’ve got a similar critique for you every time I read something and it’s mostly just missing detail, I feel like you painted your scenes well, and I know this was a tough topic, but I just feel like you’re retreading the same old stories we heard again and again in the news, maybe if you changed the perspective, gave us a story about the war with the supermarket as the center base of conflict then it would have been more interesting but I got pretty bored with it honestly, and Putin’s war/super store was a cool enough connection but just think there could have been more here.
Tough topic. Neither was super impressive but I’m leaning towards symmetrik who had a little bit better content then PA
V/Sym
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