Pondering things, with the only friend I have left , wheezing and gasping as I gather my breath ,
the smoke I inhale exudes a lavender scent , as I’m waiting to die a most spectacular death,
all I have is regrets and this cat as my pet , was given a second chance before I became trapped in this debt,
the fact that I’m bereft and devoid of life, annoys customers as they use chopsticks to enjoy their rice,
the debt collectors hunters are deployed at night , forced to quit my job as a chef to avoid their like ,
lungs feel like they’ve been stabbed with a poison knife, had a surgery but can’t afford for them perform it twice,
received an organ donation from my former wife, but a new respiratory system couldn’t transform my life ,
ya I was warned alright but I just kept chain smoking, despite the carcinogens my airways stayed open,
but eventually they also too became broken , now when they mention my name it’s only words of shame that are spoken,
I started to pray hoping that would provide some relief, but these days I’m running low on my supply of belief ,
used to serve dumplings with sauce and a side of dried beef, now I’m just a criminal trying to stay alive in these streets ,
in my condition it’s not so easy to survive as a thief, so I sit amongst the neon signs and try to retreat ,
often chased by police, I hide and they seek, no longer welcome in places frequented by the elite,
my doctors applied a technique, that I paid for through a loan, a cybernetic implant, that was glued to my bones,
it releases nano bots, that when deployed have been shown , to greatly slow the spread of any cancers that are soon to be grown,
but I failed to make the payments so one afternoon in my home , they came and ripped it from my chest to the tune of my groans ,
but I still owe the lenders, the total has to be paid, hiding from my arrears is becoming harder to fathom these days ,
the street levels too dangerous , when I’m there I go into spasms afraid, so that’s why I usually choose to travel this way,
traverse from girder to girder, stop to rest on the beams, and bask in the glow of the cities luminous screams,
the truth is obscene, despite lacking oxygen, my addiction is too strong so I keep letting toxins in ,
looking down at the ground beneath my dangling moccasins, sparks begin to fly as steel workers are busy soldering,
I feel dizzy the cities spinning as I think of opportunities wasted, and despite all the lights this communities fading,
I release from this beam and all of the sounds around me cease, as I fall in silence I have finally found my peace