Candy
You have a metaphorical way of writing where you pack in phrases and concepts
When you pull it off, it's pretty good. Good "mood" to your pieces.
I'm still having trouble when I come to nonsensical lines that just seem like they could be totally reworded for clarity.
The stencil of them shakes in its stench
Wore then the house prior still sound
Bound losses with unwell of round
Sorry, I'm just lost.
But as a whole verse, like i said the tone and mood were good. got pretty dark.
Objective
Interesting story here. Makes the readers happy that she stuck her greedy relatives.
Pretty good construction & rhymes, apart from a couple areas.
It was a story that held my attention and did just enough to win it this week.
V objective
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