Quote:
Originally Posted by Adverse
https://www.bandlab.com/revisions/02...4-501ac5b31de6
Hey guys it’s been five years since I put something out so thought I’d take some notes before I even attempted to. I know stuff like the mix isn’t great and the recording but I’m looking for a que on more technical stuff like delivery and lyrics etc. I may find a better recording area but as for equipment this is the best I’m going to do. Rough mix just so I can get some ideas from y’all. Absolutely trash it if you have to
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The track is cool, but I agree with Ajax, the vocal tone/pitch is not helping you out. It's actually distracting from the verses. I get adding some flavor to your tone but I think this would sound a lot better in your normal voice.
The tone on the hook is more listenable. Lyrics are cool. You have some punches and stuff (but we all know you can write so I feel like that's not as important to review).
A couple spots your breathing comes in loud over the mic, but that might be the mix. Concept is cool, its an ok song. The hook is straight. On the delivery side I would go for a more natural tone and use emotion/inflection to give lines more of a punch. You using melody and that's all cool but youre an octave or two too high. The high pitched voice just makes me want to turn the song off.