Artifice- A flex indeed. This piece was a tribute to high thinking musings which you brought to life with complex vocab and a strong rhyme scheme which helped the flow along nicely. Would've been nice to see this go a little longer but the said a lot within the short piece:
'one must learn that bright ideas illuminate the darkness'
My favourite line of the verse. A simple statement, but loaded with truth. You brought the whole thing around to the quote at the end neatly to finish the piece. No wasted effort here. Good stuff.
Scar- A sonnet and a limerick, like ronseal, it did what it says on the tin. While the imagery you used was polished and easy to visualise and conveyed a deeper meaning that had me re-read the piece a few times to search for; it didn't connect much to the quote for me. As a stand alone poetry piece this was really nice. In the context of the battle I felt this fell a little short. Rhyme wise it was original (or rather, so old school it comes back around new) but it hiccuped the flow in places. You definitely got a lot of skill as a writer.
Vote- Artifice, better tech and more on topic.
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