*SCENE*
UserName is sitting on his living room sectional, when he decides to get up & refill his favorite 24k gold goblet w/ a tasty beverage... as he opens the fridge, he hears a rustling in the bushes outside his lavish suburban colonial...
User: "Neigh, is that you again?! I've already filed an injunction w/ the local sheriff's department..."
*SILENCE*
User: "N-N-Neigh... if you're caught trespassing here again, they're going to put you away. I need to live my life. You can't keep doing this!"
*SOUNDS OF CRICKETS CHIRPING*
It's amazing how quiet ya 'hood is when you're in ya kitchen just vibin & cookin
But I can still hear the sound of the Police... "Every Breath You Take" while I hide in your bushes
You're a LARGE man.. ironic, that bod got my heart truly engorged
Idc if they call you "Salami Nipples" — I wanna turn your chest to a charcuterie board
Heard you got the craziest dick; veiny & thick, even the shape of it's SICK
& if they're sayin it's snipped.. it's cuz it won't fit in the frame when you're takin a pic
Leavin me love notes before this hunk wakes up to shower
Said, "you can call me your boo, K?".. had to save you in my phone as 1-800-FLOWERS
You're SEXUAL.. pullin pussy right off Snap
Girls see your shirt covered in Cheeto dust & slide in ya DM's: "Looking like a snack <3"
Ppl smashin windows.. Corona's killin.. police are spazzin
& I'm not gay, but these are trying times — so let's just experiment & see what happens ;)
That hair's got me powerless; weak — picture me proposin & how it could be
They say "Orange is The New Black".. perfect, I'm tryna cuff you while I’m down on one knee
Women say ya stroke game's EXTRA mean; supernatural
His hips doin numbers on these pussies.. when it comes to being a sex machine, User's manual
You're a head-turning homewrecker; that dastardly dick been ending marriages QUICK
A real neck-breaker, plus you're Rude to the ring — no Ravishing Rick
I saw our names next to each other on the card & thought, "matrimony"
This battle's a wake-up call.. w/ a ringtone of your voice softly whispering, "Zack... it's Tony"
__________________
Even signing my autograph’s like writing a slaughter pact
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