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Old 05-19-2020, 04:05 PM   #6
Johnny 6 feet
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Join Date: May 2020
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Shame this didn't blossom into a battle. Ha, get it?

I got vibes of Claudia from 'Interview with the Vampire' from this piece. Don't suppose you've read the book? Seen the movie? I think it was the right take to make the girl the danger in the picture you were given. The hell's she doing out there anyway? Lol.

Some stands outs:

"most kids 'd be too skittish for this neck of the woods
trees rooted in fear... so see as you near
the creepiness keeps increasing the less that you look"

A nice allusion to your mind being it's own worst enemy.

"no sorrow for the poor souls swallowed in dirt
for their bloodshed brings life to her body of work"

It's good to recycle!

You always bring that good imagery and technical skill to your writing Artifice. You should put this in OM. Good work.
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