Johnny - good work, this had good scene-setting details. The repetitious lines made it seem more of a dreamlike state caused by injuries. The way a hospital room looks and its disorienting way of showing the time of day it is, confusion in calculating the duration of stay. So an acrobat and his partner had an accident and now he's in intensive care but she didn't make it. The tone of the verse was pretty cinematic. Unsure of the latch at the end - is he a prisoner? Or a prisoner to his near-fatal injuries? Nice job.
Artifice - Very good and accurate wordplay. Solid rhyming. It hit the topic well. This wasn't an out-of-the-box approach but you gave it authority by smoothly transitioning through punchline-like thoughts, to get to the end where you meet the topic. It was a formula that I think worked.
My vote goes to Artifice but it was close. Johnny had a vivid type of approach with his story. Artifice executed well with the style he chose, and I preferred it.
THanks for the reads.
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