Candy- Caught the despair in this pretty clearly. Some tongue twisting stuff in your vocab which is difficult to pull off. Things were a little vague here and there, and I felt a more personal take on the narrator would've boosted the piece some. Good pacing, and you related to the picture well.
"so i waddle to the window of the story, make a wish
blow the streets below a kiss and swan dive into this
the undoubtable abyss"
^Most impactful (pun intended) part of the story for me.
Inno- Another downbeat piece. Not surprising given the picture. This read halfway between a political speech and a poem, plus the AB rhyme scheme is difficult to do well and that helped your piece stand out. There were some interesting philosophical points being made here:
"The world is torn and lost in translation
A fruit fallen to far from its roots
Stuck in the dirt reaching for constellations"
^Fav part^ I think the scheme went a little off the rails at the end of the piece but I was engaged throughout. Nice job
Vote- Inno
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