Universe: I almost have the same issues with your verse as you did with mine this week. Your “daydream focused on a raging ocean,” but where is it? All I see in in the image is a debris-strewn wasteland full of rubble and wreckage. It looks more like I imagine Gaza to look, a war torn village full of crumbling former housing and destruction. I certainly don’t see the waves you adhered to, nor eight legged aliens, and it doesn’t look much of a cutting room floor either if I’m honest. I don’t know where you were going with that. I mean, sure, there’s artistic licence somewhat to allow for creativity like I’ve given you for the paper flying around being a restraining order from a folder - but I think you’re stretching things too far with the alien mention personally. I don’t see that at all. I wasn’t keen on the ending, it lacked some clarity in its resolution as I wasn’t sure whether you were some sort of aborted baby that your mother hasn’t kept - or if you were inferring you’re some sort of alien life form that your parental race had left behind here on Earth - is that correct? I’m honestly not sure. The ending needed defining more as I struggled with that point and no doubt others will also. It felt rushed, as if you were looking to draw things to a close too quickly here, a little underdeveloped perhaps and less as definitive as were used to reading from you. It seemed to me the picture could have been simply about “Stop the war - for the next generations sake,” and a story build from there. It was solid enough, for sure, and it’s a shame the battle didn’t go down as you had imagined because it could have been good had Blue showed up and showed out.
Blue Bayou: Okay, so I’m not going to judge this verse by my usual method I apply for topicals - looking at it purely from an entertainment standpoint after he fired a shot at you the week before, I thought this was a hilarious way of getting back at him knowing it would likely cost you some votes but throwing caution to to the wind regardless. I LOL’d at stay inside, haywire was fresh (to me at least), SAG award was cool, I had to pause on “I smash guys,” to be real but give you the business was hard also. I fucked with that. It could be argued that this had nothing to do with the image supplied, but by that same hand you could also say it had everything to do with it - it’s a battlefield. A war zone. It’s kill or be killed. This is your domain. Your (crumbling) kingdom that’s been under attack and you’re the one to bring an end to it (the stop light) signalling to the trespasser that it’s time to turn around and go home, or enter unknown territory. This isn’t the place to play games. It’s where many have met their demise. Buried beneath the rubble and debris. Reduced to ruin. I can see the analogy if you read between the lines and apply the same artistic licence that is used throughout Universe’s piece. I saw Inno felt you had won this, and after reading through a few times - on a technical level you were both fairly even in regards to schemes and such. The flow in both is solid. I wasn’t such a fan of Universe’s text adlibs (huh?) and I did enjoy both verses on a level but in terms of pure entertainment factor and clarity - I had Blue ahead here. I think Answer and Inno have it right.
Vote - Blue Bayou
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