This felt like a poem. Eight up my ally. This was cool started off slow but the imagery picked up as it went. Do you write poetry? Feel like you got basic down. I liked your diction and thought you put together some clever phrases here and there. Tbh I dug the writing more than the subject matter if that makes sense. I’m not a fan of love stories and pinning over someone only becuase it’s been down so godam much lol. My only critic is to go outside the conventional lines when writing pieces like this. Don’t be afraid to go outside the box. Try and create the same feelings you created here with a subject that doesn’t lend its self to easy writing.
Hope that made sense
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