[IamBenT]

Great battle guys, love to read both of these writers.

Quotes...

Dead:

how a thought becomes a monster from electrical shock

- That was a great visual and a great way to bring us into the verse with the scheme,
didn't really like or get the "destined to drop", made it sound like a flex?

viewing Americana bulging behind the lens of Bolshevik's eyes
- great comparison here, funny and powerful

advertising false production like a practice rehearsal
- lIne was just hot fire here, loved that

Great ending, full of suspense all the way through, great unique voice, the character comes to life
and we are left getting a fascinating glimpse.


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Patrown:

we breathe in deep, allowing pupil's to focus
choking on our own fumes, flesh eaten by locusts
after the masks worn so long
it's a part of your face
taking away your sole along with the day

- strong imagery, great rhyme, the way you turn a phrase is so unique and shows
a real poet at work

life's melancholy lyrics are wrote with one hand
sweeping away tracks God leaves in the sand
- This image really was strong and a great way to end the verse

Lengthis a real issue for me in this, because Dead really went in with depth, metaphor, symbols, and a stronger sense of story

This battle is tough, because although Dead had a great sense of character, driving suspense, wonderful vocab and images, and strong rhyme, Patrown showed considerable skill in crafting a well written poem that related tightly to the topic and used great imagery. I love poetry, but i love great lyrics even more.

Vote -dead man