Okay, I'm gonna start this vote then come back to it later
thematically, I really liked both. Lars took the approach I would've expected (on its most basic level) in writing a story and gave it two twists in 20-ish lines. The plot here could easily be an episode of a twilight zone episode but he got everything he needed done in a short span without sacrificing much, aside from the ending (a little bit) imo
I thought Inno played with the reflection of the camera lens amazingly well. I really like how his piece was more about the big picture idea to be gleaned from this rather than a story - no disrespect to anyone who does stories, but they're what I come to expect - because to me, it didn't just take the topic and write about it so much as truly wrote to it
finishing this tomorrow
Edit: moving on
In technical writing, Lars really shined here. End rhymes were almost all on point, alliteration was used as a way to keep lines/concepts together without tripping over itself, and the inner rhymes gave it crazy flow. Innovator definitely had some quality and rhymes and alliteration, but it looked like he was more focused on getting the point across so there wasn't as much flair and flow to it. That said, with the message of his piece, I think erring on the side of too little embellishment is the right move
Then as far as development goes, I felt that Lars did a lot more to develop his starting off point. He had a plot that took a lars-esque twist, then gave it a twist ending to boot. The ending itself didn't wow me - I didn't see it coming, but something in the execution didn't do it for me - but it felt like a through and through well developed piece. I don't think Inno went too far into his angle, definitely painted a picture of exactly what he saw, but I found it to be a little lacking in development once I understood the premise
Enjoyed both of your takes, but I have Lars with more effective development of his ideas and a very technically sound read. Good shit guys
V/lars
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