Des I like the concept. Probably resonates with me cus the president dumb af lol. Anyway I like the precise wording. On the other side, I’m not feeling the Nam flip. Is one syllable in the middle of his name - no one would call him that. Second, the wording is clean for the Nam be a real threat meaning, but the wordplay not clean for the Nambia meaning (it would be missing a syllable - so like Nambia is a real...whatever it’s hard to explain). Anyways like the bar overall but that’s the critique with it.
Dy, I liked your concept as wel. Contradict this gun was was good tie in. I like be Hypocritical wordplay as well but it got a very similar issue as Des’s bar in that it works good fine for one meaning but wording is choppy for the other. So the hypocritical/contradict meaning is fine, but the hip a critical is like missing a syllable or you coulda used “leave your hip in a...” and it would work fine.
Overall, two good concepts, but wording ain’t the cleanest. I think the wordplay in both had the same issue but Des had another glaring issue with his bar being a Nam flip. I liked both bars but I think Dy edged it.
Mvgt dynamicz
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