"Yes, Mum, I'm here ...
I have sights on the target."
"Agent Young ..
prepare."
"To be fair ..
I was born ready."
"Just hold your gun steady.
This one's deadly.
Are we clear?"
"Very."
"Let's make it clean, Gary.
A single solitary shot
right between his green pupils."
"It's like a dream come true."
"On the count of 3 shoot him ...
1
.
.
2
.
.
"
*PEWN*
------------------------------------------------------------
I knew the usual procedure was to flee the murder scene
and to meet for an extraction with a certain urgency
So I placed my AR in a case that was shaped like a guitar
Then I hastily escaped and made my way into the park
As police cars darted towards the target I had sparked
I marched far enough away to evade their prison bars
But even if they'd caught me I was part of MI6
As a top-secret agent they would never take the risk
Of letting me be charged with a homicide or hit
Confidentially commissioned by the British Parliament
Once a sargeant called it in I would get a pardon quickly
By the chief of their department who'd be barked at by an MP
------------------------------------------------------
"Young, this is Mum, the extraction point has changed.
You should race towards the market there's a party on the way
of KGB agents -- your location has been traced."
"There's a traitor in our ranks?"
"As of now I can not say."
"Always ready for a tussle."
"If you see them don't engage.
The civilian population can't be privy to our games ..."
------------------------------------------------------
I stuffed the earpiece in my scarf
And dumped the gun case in the pond
Then I flung my collar up like my cover name was Bond
Sunk a glove inside my peacoat and I clutched my
BFR
As the youngest agent ever my best weapon was my heart
As I trotted through a flock of ugly geese and lovely swans
Two jug-heads encroached me on the corner of each arm
At the moment I was touched I fucked them up with Krav Maga
Crushed one's Adam's apple whole ... punched the other in his jaw
With a sudden uppercut that made him crumble and then fall
Bet they never saw it coming cos they thought I was too small
I was taught by SAS it's not size of the dog, it's the fight & his balls
And I'm a tiger striped pit that can bite through a log
------------------------------------------------------
"Za Boy is over zerrre.
He's about to gets avay.
Avenge our murdid komrade
or he'll tuuuns in his grrrave!"
------------------------------------------------------
Blaired a square-headed Russian with a Dolph Lundgren face
In less than half a second it was off to the race
Being hawked by assassins, whom were all a disgrace
.
.
[In comparisons to I ...
Cos Agent Gary Young
will embarrass terrorist spies]
.
.
I arrived at the market ... eyed my driver in a Porsh
Made a horizontal dive through the opened side's door
Their bullets ricocheted and they binged right off the car
As we pealed off in a blaze leaving tire marks and smog!
.
.
My first time on an Op and it was everything I dreamed of
From watching James Bond, Ethan Hunt and sweet Nikita
A keeper of the creed and I will never leak the secrets
Of Her Majesty The Queen, the British Government or Kingdom
I'm more than just a spy or the "unofficial" type
I'm a clandestine knight that'll gladly give my life
In allegiance to my country and the freedom she provides!
~SELF~