"Tinderella"
A finger taps the Tinder app and lights up the screen
within a flash the single man's profile is complete!
Ant smiles as he reads his own bio silently back
"TEXTS LIKE A MACHINE, PLUS I'M NICE WIT DEM HANDS
TRY ME YOU FAGGOTS LOL HASHTAG GYM BLAZE"
sliding a vast spoonful of whey into the fat assed pigs face.
Ant's had big gains since he decided to bulk
kick back and lift weights to help find him results.
So swiping some dullard sleaze or a smut
with vagina and pulse still working is easy as fuck!
Anything a three or above's fair game the rest of the time
he's not a believer in love at first site, especially online.
They can get it provided they're not an obese weight
and even then he'd be fine with getting his protein shaked.
Though these days, he's looking for a girl with more class
who won't eat steak but would suck a turd from his ass.
Who needs personal ads when there's chicks by the dozen
all perfectly matched for him at the click of a button?
Tinder is full of douche baguettes who hit him up instantly
and give up their numbers quicker than they give up their dignity.
Soon every bitch in proximity's screenshotting their phones
as Lars' dick pic's implicitly passed off as his own!
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