Max--
something dramatic was going on behind the scenes in this verse...not sure what. From the beginning you indicated that the narrator was of a certain ethnicity that was also marginalized, unjustly. Toward the middle and end tribal strife was hinted at as the mother dies. She was important to the narrator but i have no idea why. This needs more work to tie the marginalization to this 'fateful evening'...
So here lies a nomad but our journey never ends
Pitch a tent in heaven till the day i transcend...
i liked that
Adon- The buzz of modern society contrasted and seen in context of the evolutionary model. Pretty cool, pretty safe. It's true what you say and it's a good summry. You could have been more probing into an analysis. For example why we are today against our 'nature' as animals competing? I say capitalism!
i like
We went from catching sun rays to electro magnetic waves
Streaming consciousness through Earth with a phone glued to a face
The ancients were deff. not primitive people, we are more backward today imo as our mode of production forms perverted social relations, rendering man dependent not on man but upon abstractions like capital. A thoughtful piece of writing.
//
v- Adoni
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What is public must be legit, fit for average consumption, don't forget. What is private is handled by pirates, prying loose profits from prosthetics. To tell the difference between: first remain unseen with a steady breath and hope, then listen to the cracks in the wall with a stethoscope.
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