So far, the best topic given that I've seen.
I've seen MMLP write better, and basing it off that, this verse was okay. Like, barely pass the okay threshold, Lol. I dunno, I just feel like this topic could've been interpreted by both so much better.
Anyways, 2K, probably the best verse I've read from you, to be honest. I see you're slowly getting better, and it seems like you're able to focus on a topic more & make a more cohesive thought process. But, you're quite not there yet. I liked the personal approach type verse, but there's so many things about that that I disliked, and if I went into detal about all those critiques, I might come off as a dick. But anyways, it's little things like grammar used, or certain wording. Also, some stuff you said was just not factual & it irked me. This line for example:
Quote:
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I ended up hibernating for the night like a otter
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That really bugged me because, A) Otters don't hibernate & B) you can't hibernate for the night, that literally defeats the purpose of words having definitions.
Also, throne / done not rhyming really irked me :/
So like I said, although I wasn't too impressed by MMLP's verse this time around, it was still better than 2K's, although he's been improving himself.
vMMLP