[Eŋg]

cimm - this was a pretty impressive, self-contained verse which did well to form something of a character arc and in the same instance chew its own tail like a doomed world serpent. you carry a poetic cadence, bolstered by the type of soft phrasings that want to dance throughout your synapses rather than jab you in the nerve endings in a bid for attention. the verse, and the character's life, washes over the reader as if it's the undulation of the sea's current rocking back and forth -- which is fitting, given what you're trying to do. 'glass ceilings (...) reflect all the things' was a brilliant pair of lines for me with its layered meanings. 'brain still the same' was appropriately terse. i appreciated the slide/ladder paralleling itself, and the circular close to the piece. i would say it didn't drive home the topic for me: the dig, the grind, the shovel of Time, but i can discern the path you took. beyond solid showing. word.

black - there's more of a palpable progression here for your protagonist (who is basically the same guy, inspired loosely by you, spanning infinitesimally different multiverses) than i am used to seeing from you but maybe i'm a bit out of the loop, remembering when i used to read you more. this was another quality offering that took a cue from the topic and ran with it. the sprint, more long-distance lap, was true. as mentioned, 'percocet peyote' et al was indulgent, self-insistent really. it would have been enough to allude briefly, i think. what impressed me most was the almost-reprise 'mantra of our fathers' and 'Father. with his mantras' because, by the time you recalled them, they held gravity. 'somebody's son' worked similarly, as did the callback of Apocalypse -- that's stellar stitching, not unlike your opponent. reminding a lost character of himself, and us of the title. his initial dogma descending to fugue only to eventually find light, and solid ground, through the disillusion based on similar principles should stir empathy in a reader even if a touch trite at this point. you embodied the weight of Time well here, as per the topic.

this is a close one, and i'm leaning toward black for a more full-bodied work.