[Adonis]

I said I didn't know who either writer was in mag, well we about to find out. Leggo!

Fice - Your very first line is just a great opener man. Very nice set up, I like where we're headed. Until the syllable count was off with that second line, no matter. I'll finish the read now. Also, "Tonights the night" is redundant as hell, I don't know how I feel about this one though because it really does make for a sound sentence and one I probably would not batt and eye at either, I just think it sounds a bit off now that I look at is all. "Butterflies pollinate my nerves" Perfect wording here friend, a fine idiom indeed, this sentence explains so much, I love it. Again with the repetitiveness, "Going out to make-out point". I would focus on steering clear of such lines, this would give you a bit more polish. Solid verse with one glaring error, and a major one too. The first half of the verse was purely first person narrative, then this... "he ties his bowtie with hopes high that he won't embarrass himself" and you spoke in that tense the rest of the way. It sucks that you made this simpler and common mistake on a fairly sound verse, but like I said, glaring. I enjoyed the read though, no crazy twist or shock value emptiness, just a personal look into a relationship of the budding stage. Sound writing in the end though, you are relatively detailed with conceptual lines that really stand out and give you an edge in that close vote swing in my personal opinion. I enjoyed it, thank you. Oh, I will add and finish with this, although you executed the topic, the route you chose seemed a bit uninspired and not as out of the box or progressive as I would have liked. You did however, execute your concept of choice fine though, just not as forward thinking as I usually prefer.


Addy - LMFAO at that abbreviation, I kill myself. Oh fuck, they had sketchers when you were a kid? You're younger then my younger brother man, FML I need to retire from this shit. So far you have a very distinct and descriptive style, but after "I followed her home" I just love where the story is going. I don't remember the name, but this reminds me of a Brother Ali song (haven't listened to him in ages) that is about him stalking and harassing some chick, dope track. You're transitions in tense and scenery, shit, even time is really good. From "the meet" to driving in a car to funeral in such a small amount of lines is impressive. Ohhhhh.... "I was in the passenger seat in the same wreck, that mangled corvette...I strapped myself in the backseat" you fucked that one up brah. Fuck you, I just noticed what you did in the beginning. Started off as the guy staring at the girl, but later transitioned into the girl as you started talking. That's pretty damn conceited and smart on her part, I love it. You are a vet in my eyes, very polished writing, very particular and detailed on all fronts. Thank you.


This was a dope battle boys, fit the bill for title match. Both verses are sound, but in my eyes Adverse had the better verse. His flow was more natural, though art's wasn't bad, just not as smooth and natural sounding. Both concepts were on the same level on face value, but given all pageantry and tip-toeing Addy had regarding transitions and tense changes and character changes, that execution rating sky rocketed due to the degree of difficulty. Simply put, Adverse wrote a motherfucker of a verse where Art wrote a very good one.


v/Adverse