[uh-oh]

you do the beats?

the return slaps, maybe some variation on the kick's bass, and some variation on the snares in the velocity levels. like drop the middle snares down a little just to give it a looser vibe. like PAP, pap, paP, PAP. pap paP PAP.

but yea good comments first. the overall production, not just the beat but song structure, you are leaps and bounds better before, this was structured and vibes well, i wasnt a fan of the guitars towards the end but i liked the weird filtery stuff before it, and the whole structure of the track.

the constructive comments tho, your writing took a step back. to piggy back on the production comments, the structure of all the writing/what and how your rapping is solid, but whats actually being said could be stepped up. when making more just keep that in mind. just think of unique shit to say, weird words. like i don't rap but on my drive to work i play my beats in the truck and free a little and every know and then i get a word like the other day it was SOLITUDE. and i snapped because its just a random word that popped up while i was thinking of a name for a track, but from there its, SOLITUDE BEEN A SOLID DUDE BUT NEVER FOLLOW THROUGH etc. and a bunch of words that rhyme follow and shit. but basically just try and be more fluid and intricate with it, because the writing is to simple

but again the writing is good in the sense of songwriting. the lyrics arent. if that makes any sense.

like it sounds like a reference track. like if you were trying to sell the song itself, showing what could be done on it to another emcee, where he would run with your idea but pen his own verses.

but yea the production value and everything seems to be going way up just from a structure and song writing sense.

this beat could be crazy. the 808's coming in but if you brought in some crazy hats and more 808 kicks booming, like it is dope starting out bare bones, but when the kicks drop bring the whole drumline in KNOCKING and MOVING.

but again, pretty much the same crits as the last one, i feel like the IDEA of the hook and shit is SOLID.

if i knew how, and i was you i'd try to sell these to a fat agrresive black dude from like memphis or something with those yellow bloodshot slavery eyes. like if he was all agressively spitting THEY TURNED ME TO A BEAST, THEY TURNED ME TO AN ANIMAL id be alllllllll in.

i feel like you'd be better producing these but as a rapper i think you should go another direction honestly.

dope to see you dropping again tho

if you don't mind and wanna send me the wavs for the transformation i'd like to play with it, and i can send you what i do. i wanna try and see if i can throw some hats and shit on it to get it going crazy