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Old 05-04-2016, 05:21 PM   #6
Inno
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 10,025
Battle Record: 26-54


Champed
- Lime Green Poetry Association
- Black August
- 1-2 Punch League

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Adonis

This felt rushed and emotion less. Though you kept my interest throughout, it was barely. I feel like you went with and easy route with predictable outcomes. You could of took this topic and just forrest gumped it. But you just sprinted. Im leaning more towards rushed. Feels like that.


Razah.

Same as well. Felt like this was bland. Could of used more content with each line. Though i do feel like your story cane along much better than adonis'. It wasnt by much.

Overall.


I got razah with am ore cohesive and consistent piece. Adonis' verse felt rushed. Almost a no show verse? Either way i dig both verses but ive seen you both dropp way better.

Razah
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