J – you never seem to disappoint anymore.
The writing was smooth throughout. The story was madness but that’s fine cuz its followed the pattern of this ‘wonderful’ yet weird (kinda dream sequence) picture. The pic was painted with words lol, maybe a little too direct but a good tale here that rhymes fluently. I am a ‘pun guy’ so the last line was brilliant haha!
Breathless -
Again the story was madness but its fine, it was hard to grasp exactly what was going on. this section ‘struck a chord’ with me..
“Deep rumblings strike a chord inside, intertwined emotions wrap around past passions.
Music class that I hated because I loved it but wasn't able to show enough talent.
The teacher I dreamed of dancing with before I even knew what lust was to have it.”
I resonated with it a little and it seems like an adult reflecting on childhood emotions, it was dope in fairness. Most profound bars of the battle by far. The spirit molecule suggests you’ve brought to life the perspective of a molecule? Which would be a hilariously good take on the topic.
but again it wasn’t as clear has J’s verse so I give him the edge here!
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