My phone died while I was midway through this... So, short and sweet
JW - cadence was too perfect for the first half and came off repetive, almost singsongy, like a limerick that went on too long without a change. That was my only complaint, oh, and devour, like, wtf, devour?
Sym - as I was reading I highlted and copied the second and third quatrain not realizing it was half of the piece lol. It had a nice early 2000s Slug/Atmosphere vibe that I was really digging, nice twist with the girl being his daughter. If you would've wrote more I would've voted for you almost surely
Vote - jw
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