Artifice,
Quote:
now Steve's a blue collar kid who fully knew what his father did
saw the footsteps that the soot left & yet was still choosin' to follow it
acknowledged in the trades but Steve was faltering in grades
so he took an honest look at his limits... & he called a spade a spade
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damn
Great take on the theme, name use was on point and didn't feel forced. Although the main basis was predictable after the premise was set you did a good job with making believable and entertaining story scenes.
Razah, this was some raw hip hop shit, after noticing the cadence a few lines in, it was like I wasn't consciously reading it, just hearing it with my eyeballs. I like that you did a 1st person piece rather than the classical story style, I think this form is often overlooked, but, it's my slice of tea. But, that being said, it did sort of get mehy in the middle, and, doing a verse like this in a storytelling dominant league, you gotta go ham as a extra meat Hawaiian pizza in order to compete. This ain't bad, but, it just wasn't ain't bad enough
Vote - Artifice