Vivid & symetrik
A fun (though somewhat twisted) read. Interesting approach to the narrative, though i found the style made the flow more difficult for me to really catch, found myself re-reading a couple lines to make sure I got the rhyme right. Liked the twist you threw in, definitely takes a left turn, and it's not just an abrupt turn that sits nowhere, it continues to develop, leaving it more fully fleshed out. One of the more unique pieces I remember reading tbh, though I can't say I loved it.
Just Write and Razah
While not a subject new to topicals, I thought you both did a good job of setting up the scenario and then breaking it apart, I felt that although the change in decision happened quickly, it felt organic, like someone would actually have that 'snap' change of mind in that moment. Also thought that your styles really matched up, found the whole verse flowed smoothly.
You'll have what you need, don't ever covet your peers
Always gather your strength 'til you're overcoming your fears
Not getting what you want will make you want to live unruly
Just know all the ugly in life has a glimpse of beauty
that quartet there stood out to me, really felt like something a parent would try to pen to a future child.
Overall, both were cool reads, but I gotta give the edge to Just & Raz for a verse that felt a little more solid, all things considered.
v/ Just Write & Razah
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